The end of another month

I really have no idea where time is flying to these days...none at all!  I really can't believe that tomorrow is the beginning of May, but I'll be honest, I'm pretty excited about it!  Four weeks from today will be the last day of school.  I am tremendously looking forward to that.  I seem to find myself more and more frustrated with school this time each year.

We made our summer "vacation" reservations last evening.  We are taking just two nights and going to an indoor water park that is less than an hour away.  The kids have been wanting to go for years since my sister told them at Christmas of 2013 that would be their gift for the year.  It never happened, and while I'm sure she will be somewhat irritated that we are "stepping" on her gift, I figure if she can't get around to it in 17 months than we are going to step in.  Our family agreed that since we are taking a "minication" this year, we are putting the savings from what we would spend on a larger vacation towards a trip to Florida next year.  That is going to be our last big family vacation most likely, and we want to be able to really enjoy it.

My mom has surgery tomorrow to repair her rotator cuff from her fall right after Easter.  Thankfully, my sister is able to get her to the hospital in the morning, but most likely will not stay for the entire procedure and certainly not through recovery.  I am grateful beyond words that a friend of Mom's is arriving tomorrow evening from Illinois and staying until next Thursday, which will be getting her through the worst of the recovery.  By the time Karen leaves, Mom should have some better mobility and strength.

There are other things I want to write, but I'll save them for other posts.  After being gone most days this week either helping Mom or catching up on my own errands, and then being gone tomorrow for the surgery, this house isn't going to clean itself!

Honoring Dad

Today would've been my dad's birthday.  To be honest, this is the toughest day of the year without him.  Christmas is still Christmas no matter what, but with Dad gone his day to celebrate is just hard to get through.

I've had a really busy weekend with some volunteer obligations and helping my mom with some things, and while I'm beyond exhausted, I'm grateful it doesn't leave me much time to think.  We are definitely taking time to remember him though.  Today we stopped for ice cream after shopping...my dad absolutely LOVED having ice cream around.  In fact, his dad LOVED ice cream too and I think Dad got it from Grandpa.  Dad always had ice cream up at his cottage, and he loved taking us out for cones when we were up there hanging out.  We also are having fried chicken for dinner this evening since it was his favorite meal.  The weather has been gorgeous today, and I know Dad sends his love down to us just as we send our love to him!

Our family fund

When my father passed away, a family fund was established with his life insurance policy and memorial donations.  It was established that the fund was to be used primarily for my hometown's dog park and library as well as STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) education.  It was also established such that my sister and I are to be the advisers for the fund until our passing, when it reverts into the larger community fund.  I am so pleased that we have just awarded our first grant, and it has a personal connection.

My sister let me know that one of my hometown's Destination Imagination teams has qualified for national competition.  They need funds in order to be able to afford the trip, and it is an honor to be able to contribute to their fundraising.  In addition, the granddaughter of my dad's best friend (who passed away just weeks before Dad) is a member of the team.  I can't imagine a better way to award our first grant!

An emotional response

Yesterday morning when I took the food out to the neighborhood cats, I kept looking out the window waiting for any of them to arrive.  About an hour passed and I had yet to see any of them.  I decided that perhaps someone in the neighborhood had just decided to take them in, or perhaps they had been gathered up and taken to a shelter.  I decided it was for the best, and then I began to cry.  How could I possibly be crying over something that shouldn't really matter to me?

But of course, I wasn't just crying about the cats.  I was crying about my dad's birthday being this weekend and how much I miss him every day.  I was crying about my mother needing surgery next week and the lengthy recovery process that is going to take me away from my kids more than I'd like.  I was crying about how big and grown up my kids are getting and the passage of time.  I was crying about Robert's unbelievably poor choices and the fear and hopelessness I sometimes feel when it comes to being a parent of a teenager.  I was crying over the meanness and disrespect that seems to be so prevalent in society today (especially in the younger generation).  I was crying over the fact that we left such a fabulous group of friends behind to move here, and can't seem to find any new friends here.  I was crying over the atrocities that are happening in our world every day.  I was crying over the extreme generosity of individuals who give so much when they themselves have so very little.  I was crying with anger that those that have more don't give more.  And of course, I was crying for the sweet little creatures that are living in our woods and now face an uncertain existence.

As you can see, I'm a little high strung right now.  I'm tired, but I hang on every day to how amazingly blessed my life is.  I am so very grateful to live this life, and know that things will start to feel better!  Oh, and the cats did come out and eat throughout the day and two of them enjoyed scampering and playing in our yard last evening!

Neighborhood cats

When we moved into our house nearly two years ago, we were aware of the cats that lived in our woods.  Apparently when the house on the corner next to us had gone into foreclosure 18 mos prior to our move, the resident had nearly 20 cats that were left behind.  They were rounded up by neighborhood residents and taken to a vet who helped to spay/neuter them.  Homes were found for as many as possible and the rest remained living in the woods.  At the time we moved in, I believe there were six or seven.  A resident of our neighborhood would traipse through our back yard everyday without fail, regardless of weather conditions to feed the cats, and she even had cat carriers in the woods so that the cats had shelter.  Our family loved when the cats came out of the woods to sun themselves on our woodpile or just hang out for a bit.

Unfortunately, the lady feeding the cats sent us a copy of the letter she received from our homeowner's association stating that she was no longer allowed to provide shelter or have feeding stations for the cats.  She let us know that she would no longer be in our yard, and from the tone, I suspect that she thought we were the ones that had complained since we were the newest residents.  The woods are common property owned by the association, and they were within their legal rights to do what they did.  I was absolutely heartbroken.  I could not bear the thought that the four (those are the only ones left) could be going without food.  When we saw them appear at the edge of the woods on Sunday evening, I took a big container of food out to them.  All four spent a good deal of time chowing down.  Andrew and I talked, and agreed that we would do that each day.  The container remains on our property and I bring it in each evening so that critters, etc. are not drawn to it (one of the complaints mentioned by the association).  We aren't sure what we will do about putting the food out on rainy days, and we aren't sure how we'll feel about the shelter situation as fall and winter come, but for right now we have a routine going.  The kids and I are really enjoying seeing the cats coming into our yard more frequently!

Feeling the weight of the world

There is something about mid-April that I find tough...although to be honest, parenting teens makes any day/date feel tough.  It can be an emotionally draining experience that can truly zap you to the core.  Sound dramatic?  Welcome to life with teens.

The reminders that American history can bring to this week are also tough.  On April 15th is the anniversary of the bombing at the Boston Marathon.  The 16th is the anniversary of the Virginia Tech massacre, the 19th is the anniversary of BOTH the Oklahoma City bombing and the end of the Waco siege, and today is the anniversary of the Columbine High School shootings.  While there are so many amazing examples of humanity and goodness in these tragedies, sometimes it is tough not to feel completely overwhelmed at the evil in the world.  This only exacerbates the worry and fear of my teens' poor choices.

This is something of a melancholy post...probably aided a great deal by the steady and dreary rain falling on this Monday morning.  I still choose to live every day grateful for life, and even rain might mean a little extra time at home together as a family!

It was the perfect amount of time away

Yesterday, early afternoon, I left home for Indy.  Due to a previous commitment of one of my friends, I was back home mid-morning today.  It was absolutely the perfect amount of time away.

It had been over a year since I'd been able to visit with our friend in Chicago.  As we get older, we find that we make more of an effort to spend time together.  He understand the challenges of my schedule, not to mention my fear/intense dislike of big cities, and since his family is nearby it's usually a matter of visiting for a couple of hours here.  This conference in Indy provided us hours upon hour of uninterrupted visiting time, and it could not have been more perfect.  We stayed at a fabulous downtown hotel where we didn't need to leave the premises if we didn't want to.  We did walk next door for dinner, but that was as far away as we strayed.  We spent our time hanging out at the hotel bar/restaurant and pool, and could have taken advantage of the wine bar or spa had we chosen to do so.  It was a perfect way to relax after last week!

A very trying week

This has been an unbelievably trying week as a parent.  Robert has been home with me all week and has just returned to school today.  I am looking forward to the peace and quiet that today will bring.

I am also very much looking forward to this weekend.  A friend of mine from Chicago is going to be in Indy this weekend and suggested that we meet up.  Another friend and I are going to do so and we are so excited to get the opportunity to visit.  And I am incredibly grateful to my husband who didn't hesitate to urge me to go when I brought it up.  He is just such an incredibly supportive man and I have no idea how I got so lucky.

In addition to the parenting stresses, it seems as though my mother's injuries from last week's fall were more substantial than originally thought, and it appears as though surgery is in her future.  As always she is fabulously philosophical about everything, but I can't help but wish she just didn't have to deal with so much.  We know, though, that it could be much worse and try to keep that perspective!

It looks like I'll be home again next year

After some discussion, it looks as though I will be home again next year.  I continue to be amazed at my wonderful husband.  Some incidents occurred that led me to this conclusion, and when I mentioned it to Andrew, his response was "I absolutely agree.  No question."  I am so very grateful for his support in this area.  I'm sure there are many people who wonder why on earth a woman would need to be home full time with what next year will be a high schooler and two middle schoolers, but this is what works best for our family.  This is what I am most needed to do right now.  I've told Andrew that we are going to check with some colleagues to see if they might have need of a morning babysitter as I'll be up with my older kids anyway, and that might give me the opportunity to earn a few extra dollars each week during the school year.  Everything happens for a reason!

It's always a little bittersweet

Last evening our middle school team had a track meet.  Catherine wasn't participating as they could only have two entries per event, but it was the only ms track meet all this season where our former school could be there.  I decided Catherine and I would go and support both of the teams.

It's such a bittersweet experience for me though.  I know very, very few of the names of Catherine's classmates, and while she does have some friends on the team, most of them weren't participating either so she didn't really know the names either.  In the meantime, I watched Aiden win the 100m dash.  I've known Aiden since she was in Kindergarten and she and her eight brothers (yes, eight!) are nine of my most favorite people in the world.  I was so happy to see and hug her parents at the meet.  I was able to see Clara win the 1600m run and Ryan win the boys' side of the same race.  I love Clara and Ryan...they are great kids!  Our very good friend Amanda is one of the coaches, and I was just so happy to see so many friendly faces.  It always makes me so happy.

And yet, it puts a hole in my heart as well.  I was in the middle of watching the kids grow up, and I knew their siblings and parents (and in some cases grandparents!).  We were such a part of the community there, and that isn't happening there.  As I told Aiden's parents last night, sometimes I think Andrew is counting down until Thomas graduates so that we can move back.

At the same time, Andrew and I both agree that we wouldn't change this move for anything.  THIS is where the kids need to be for school.  We have absolute certainty about that.  As far as an educational environment, this can't be beat.  And the kids all really love being here.  Thomas misses his friends at times, but we do what we can to get them together.  Overall, the kids have handled this move tremendously well and never looked back.  I am so grateful for that...and I truly am grateful that we are in this house and the kids are in these schools.  But sometimes, I get a little teary eyed about our friends and community we left behind.

Ending our break

Today is a really nice way to end our break.  I know we still have the weekend, but we always have that and it is going to be REALLY busy.  Today was one of the few days we were able to sleep in over break.  Several mornings Catherine had track practice at 8AM so we were up and at 'em many days.  There is also zero chance that we will ever be able to convince my in-laws to attend anything but the early Mass, so no sleeping in that day at all!  Anyway, we don't really have anything set in stone for the day in terms of a schedule, so we are enjoying a laid back morning.  Andrew is making pancakes and bacon for breakfast and we are all still in our pajamas.  Last evening was also very nice.  We all hung out together in our living room (rather than our family room which is rather tiny) and I loved how we could all be together but still doing our own thing with our own space...it was a very nice evening.  We had lunch with my mom and a friend yesterday, and that led to leftovers for dinner.  I am so grateful for the relaxation of these couple of days!

Mom's mishap

Last week, my mom was on a cruise.  She was due to arrive back home on Saturday, although by then we would be at my in-laws.  She and my sister spent Easter with my grandmother (Dad's mom) and aunt & uncle.  I chatted with her briefly on Saturday when she let me know that she was home, and I planned to give her a quick call when we arrived back home on Monday.  However, we had not yet left the state of PA when my cell phone rang.  I immediately panicked when I recognized it was a friend of my mom's...there could be no good reason for her needing to call me.  And I was correct!  Mom had fallen that morning and her good friend had taken her to the e/r.  While they were trying to get some x-rays of the shoulder, it had become dislocated.  Mom was in a great deal of pain, but was hanging in there.  I felt awful, but there was literally nothing I could do.  My aunt called me again as we were nearly home to let me know that my mom was back at her house and G.G. would be staying with her.  I checked in quickly when we finally made it back to our house, and although groggy, she was doing fine.  It's her right arm which is really inconvenient for her, but she has very good friends who are again tremendously helpful.  We had made plans to have lunch this afternoon and we are keeping them...I'm sure she has much to tell us!

Birthdays

Today is my sister's birthday.  The kids sent her a card over the weekend, and will call her later this evening.  She will receive her card from Andrew and I, along with her gift, when we next see her.

Today is also the birthday of the very special little girl, Grace.  It's so hard to believe she's been gone two years.  I just can't stop thinking about her amazing smile.  She touched all of our hearts in just the short time she was here.  Last evening, Catherine behaved like I've never experienced before...even climbing out of her window when we sent her to her room.  It was absolutely unreal.  At the same time, I'll take the stress and chaos (and fatigue) of parenting my teens any day over the alternative of them not being here...it's a sickening thought!

Happy birthday to Katie, Grace, and all the others out there!

Easter weekend and the beginning of break

We left late Saturday morning to make the trip to my in-laws.  To be honest, it's a pretty stressful visit.  My brother-in-law has been released from the care facility, and is living in a house about six blocks from Andrew's parents.  He is refusing any outside help, and doesn't really want his parents' help either, but he is in denial that he can't physically do things on his own.  He basically doesn't want to speak to his parents and they can't hardly stand to be around him, yet they feel trapped by these circumstances.  It's a very tense and stressful situation for everyone.  We made a short visit to my brother-in-law when we first arrived, and he was supposed to join us for dinner on Sunday.  Unfortunately, he didn't feel well, but even Andrew admitted it made our evening visit with his parents so much more pleasant.  We were back on the road home Monday morning, and made it home in time to see most of Opening Day for the Cincinnati Reds.  We had a snacky kind of dinner while watching the game (a 5-2 Reds victory).  And on the upside we have the rest of break to still enjoy!

A cool way to begin our break

I must say, I am not going to complain about the way we are beginning our break.  It was originally shaking up to be a pretty busy evening with Robert having an away track meet and Catherine having one here in town.  A cousin was also going to be in town as her daughter's softball team was playing here and I was hoping to get to see them.  As the forecast began shaping up though, I was pretty sure everything was going to be canceled.  Sure enough, Catherine's meet was canceled by late morning, Robert's by early afternoon, and not too long ago my cousin let me know the softball game wasn't happening either.  I really can't complain about beginning our spring break with absolutely nothing to do this evening!

It was just like old times

Last evening we had so much fun visiting with our friends.  We were able to spend several hours with them and we absolutely had a blast.  It was very late when we came home and we'll be tired today, but it was so worth it.  I've very much come to learn how very special and rare those types of friendships are.  Our friends from MO had to head back today, but we are hoping to see them again this summer, and we made plans, even though it won't be for a couple of months, we made plans to visit with our other friends as well!

We get an evening out!

This evening Andrew and I have plans to journey back to our former town for dinner with friends.  Normally we wouldn't try scheduling something like this on a school night in the middle of the week, but we don't have school here Friday as the beginning of our spring break, and our former district is off this week so they aren't working.  In addition, our friends from MO came into town on Sunday and they are leaving tomorrow, so this is really the best opportunity to try to get together.  I am so very, very excited about an evening out, and I'm even more excited that we get to spend it with friends!  We haven't seen any of them since New Year's Eve, so it will be absolutely fabulous to get together and hang out for a bit!

The beginning of track season

I am enjoying watching my kids participate in track.  Robert is picking up where he left off in the discus.  It's a pound heavier than the middle school discus, but he's doing just fine for a freshman and is already.  We discussed yesterday that he has a lot of potential in that particular event.  He was asked to pole vault, and he's learning the ropes on that as well.  Unfortunately with the schedules, I haven't been able to see him in that event.  I also think pole vaulting might help him with his diving.  He's also participating in a few running events, specifically relays, and he's just really enjoying the season.

Catherine is participating as well.  She jogged her 200m sprint at her first meet.  I'd never seen anything like it!  She's also doing some field events, but her coaches have commented that mostly she seems to just be there for the social aspect...and I'm okay with that.  She is a fabulous teammate in terms of support and cheering, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Since the high school and middle school have separate schedules, we are staying very busy!