Mid-June

I am off work today, and I've enjoyed the quiet.  I don't get much alone time in my house in the summer, and I'm cherishing this opportunity.  Catherine is home from work, but is taking a nap in her room.  I should be more productive, but I'm listening to our sink drive (ugh!) and enjoying our cat, Maudie, who is insisting to be right up against me (it's a little warm, but sweet).

Tuesday, Andrew hit the road again, God love him.  Our original plan for the summer had been to take a trip to Vermont at the end of July and to take his mom with us as it was a visit to Andrew's aunt who is 92.  However, the week before we left for vacation, a phone call came explaining that Aunt had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.  Treatment would only extended the inevitable, and at 92, well...I think you understand.  It was decided that Andrew and his mom would make the trip right away, and unfortunately it meant I couldn't go.  I'm so, so grateful though, that Andrew and his mom are able to do this.

I've also been spending day looking around at my house.  I love photos.  I love having memories literally staring at me.  The hard part?  I can't cover every single wall space and flat surface with photo frames.  In the last six weeks, we've had two big photo-worthy events in the wedding and our vacation.  As I said, we took a TON of photos on vacation.  I'm trying to not have a cluttered house, while also having these memories surround me.  They truly bring me joy.  

I am so grateful for this summer and the slower pace of life!

Photo memories

The thing I've been working on most during the break has been labeling and organizing photos.  Some of them went all the way back to 2017, most were from the 2020's, especially in the last two years.  Honestly, it was a bit of an emotional experience.  Eight years ago, Thomas was in middle school.  It broke my heart a bit to see him that young.  I worked on the pictures from the last Thanksgiving G.G. was alive.  It caught my heart to see the family gatherings that we don't get to have anymore.  There were pictures of Rosie that we lost in August, 2022, and more heart-wrenching were the photos of Lincoln, and especially of Abby, both of whom passed in October.  In spite of a few teary eyes, I am so, so, so grateful for those memories!

This date

This date has some sad memories for me.  It was four years ago today that we lost our good friend, Tim.  It was so unexpected, and I'll never forget that day.  Five years ago today was a really rough day for our family.  I won't go into details for the privacy of my children, but it was a really, really hard day.  It was on this date 38 years ago today that my grandfather passed away.  Even though we knew that was coming, it too is a day I'll never forget.  Another memory is from 33 years ago today.  It was my senior year of high school, and our boys' basketball team was playing in the first round tournament game.  They'd won an incredible game two days earlier that went into double overtime that secured the league title.  It seemed as though the emotions and stress of that game caught up with them and they couldn't pull out the expected first round victory.  Thirty-three years later, I can still remember seeing my friend Ryan sitting on the bench as time expired.  I had never missed a home basketball game in which he played, and it all came to an end that evening.  That is not a memory I think of often, but it happened on a Sunday, and with Ryan gone, it feels a little sadder this year.

On the upside, today was a very nice day.  We ran some errands, and we had an impromptu dinner wtih friends.  Ready for another week!

An unexpectedly lovely Wednesday evening

We've made it over the hump of the week.  And the best part is that there are only five more working days remaining in the calendar year for me!  Yay!!!

Wednesday is the day we get out of school early, and I only had one quick errand to run before coming home.  Unfortunately, Andrew has to work at a basketball game this evening, but Catherine is here with me.  I was able to finish up the gifts for the church Giving Tree and accomplish a few other things.  The trees are lit, the balsam candle is lit, it's snowing outside, and we put the fireplace with Christmas music on TV.  Catherine was making a dessert for her school carry-in potluck meal.  I had to smile as it reminded me of so many memories of past holiday seasons.  Catherine even mentioned that she wished Thomas was here.  At first she mentioned it was because he was a big help with her dessert, but then later she admitted she enjoys having him around.

Two weeks until Christmas.  Looking forward to down time and hopefully a good amount of family time!

Sixteen years of blogging

It's my blogversary!  Sixteen years of recording memories here on the blog!  I'm so grateful I started this sixteen years ago, and I'm so grateful for the memories recorded here.  I can't really think of a better way to have recorded my kids' childhoods.

We are well into the holiday season.  Today was one of those days when I began to wonder if I'm going to find time to sleep at all between now and Christmas.  In addition to my jobs, this is the busy time with the church job with it being the end of the year.  I'm also in charge of the Giving Tree at church, which I love!  This year, though, most of the gifts are being purchased by financial donations to the church rather than members doing shopping.  It is truly, truly a privilege to be able to provide Christmas for two families including seven children.  It brings me great joy.  I think almost everything is purchased, now I just need to get everything wrapped.  I love seeing the stacks of gifts pile up!

We had lunch with our good friends today.  We haven't been able to get together since August, and we didn't want to wait until Christmas Eve for our next visit.  Friday evening was a gathering with some of Andrew's colleagues.  It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Making memories

Here we are, at the day before Thanksgiving, and I am looking at my nicely decorated Christmas tree.  I have ALWAYS refused to decorate before Thanksgiving, but since we ate on Sunday, and especially since Thanksgiving is so late this year, bring it on!

It actually happened in an unplanned way.  I was working on getting the trees up for planned decorating this evening.  Thomas texted as he was off work early and they were actually in the area in early afternoon.  I was happy to accept extra help in getting the trees put together and with lights, and Andrew was happy to have some help with the outside lights.  Everyone worked all afternoon, and after a quick break of pizza for dinner, the trees were all decorated by 7:30 last evening.  Thomas's fiance specifically mentioned how much she had enjoyed helping and sharing in this tradition.  The tree is full of so very many memories.  Andrew became a bit emotional as there are so many ornaments for our sweet pup.  She was included every year.   Thomas wanted to take some of his favorite ornaments with him.  It was fine, but I insisted on taking pictures! We laughed, but those memories are important to me as well.  In fact, apparently he was complaining to his fiance (let's call her Lynn, going forward) that the tree at their apartment only had "generic" ornaments on it.  I'm grateful these traditions and memories mean as much to them as they do to me.

A day off by myself

Today is a teacher work day at my school, and I am thrilled to be off work.  During the school year, it is really challenging to take off days "just because" (or as I like to think of them, mental health days), but when the students aren't there it is much easier!  I asked for this a month ago, right after the week from hell when I was the only admin working most of the week and we had teachers out left and right.  In other words, when they didn't dare tell me I couldn't! 😂

Yesterday I finished painting Thomas's room.  It's the exact same colors, but we joke that his room was a toxic haz mat dump and everything needed refreshing.  I always channel my dad when I'm painting, because we were the painters in the family.  I also found my self spending the day listening to 90's country music, and that was quite a trip down memory lane!

I'm so very acutely feeling the passage of time lately.  The upcoming holidays have me feeling incredibly reflective this year, and a bit melancholy, and I'm just not sure where the time has gone.  I'm so very grateful for this afternoon where I can spend some quiet time with my thoughts.  A lot of those thoughts also involve our sweet pup whom we miss so much.  Those are sad thoughts as well, but there is so, so much to be grateful for, and this is the month to remember that!

An afternoon in my hometown

I made a trip to my hometown today.  I stopped to see my grandmother for just a few minutes.  She wasn't having a great day, but I'm glad I was able to see her.  I then met my friend, Heather, for lunch.  It was a quick lunch, and a nice visit.  I then did some shopping at the local stores, and I was able to see another high school friend who owns some of the businesses.  And lastly, I ran into my cousin.  It was a fairly quick trip, but a very nice trip.

Upon getting home, I began painting (what was) Thomas's bedroom.  My mother-in-law arrives in nine days and she needs to sleep in there.  Painting always causes me to channel my dad, and we are only give days until the anniversary of his passing.  I was also listening to a 90's Country channel, and lots of memories came flooding in with those songs as well.

I'm so grateful for this weekend.  And I'm especially grateful that I am taking Monday off work and get an even longer weekend! 

Pete Rose died

Last evening we learned that Pete Rose had passed away.  My sister let me know.  I really wanted to write, but I wasn't feeling well at all.  My sister and I share so many memories from our childhood that involve the Reds, and specifically, Pete Rose.  I remember being devastated when he started playing for the Phillies, and I was beyond thrilled when he came to back to Cincinnati from Montreal.  I vividly remember watching the game on TV the night that he hit #4192.  It's always sad to lose parts of our childhood.  So, so many memories.

It took my breath away

My grandmother is in the hospital.  She is not critically ill, and I'm grateful.  She has a serious infection and needs IV antibiotics.  She isn't in any pain and she doesn't feel awful.  These are all good things.  At the same time, she is 92, and that is simply reality.

I made a trip to the hospital to see her this afternoon.  I needed to stop by her assisted living facility and pick up her glasses.  I decided to take the back roads to the hospital from there, and in doing so, I drove past the house she and my grandfather lived in for the first 29 years of my life.  Oh goodness, driving down that road literally took my breath away.  I was so blessed to have grown up with both sets of grandparents living within a five-minute drive of my home, so many, many trips were made down that road.  It all just felt so surreal.

I don't think this is the end for Grandma, but I do know that she is weakening.  Reality is that she may not be able to return to assisted living...we really don't know what the future holds.  I told her I loved her as I was leaving and she became emotional.  Oh goodness, it's been quite an afternoon.

Our wall of memories

I've written before about how I love having photo memories surrounding me.  I've been this way since high school.  I started noticing last fall though, that my wall of memories was in need of some updating.  For one thing, I had put the photo collages together last century (literally), in some cases, and frame styles have changed.  I also realized that because I had put the collages together before even meeting my husband, his family was not as well represented as I would have liked.  I was motivated, though, when my husband's cousin sent us a years' worth of digitized photos as Christmas.  I had purchased a bunch of new collage frames, and finally got my act together a couple of weeks ago to order the prints I wanted.  There are several from my husband's family, a few from when the kids were little, some with friends, on and on.  We finally got everything hung today, and I find myself standing in the hall and just smiling as I scan the photos.  The wall is full of so many wonderful memories.  As I've turned 50, while I certainly hope there are plenty of more years in front of me, I also have to acknowledge that there are more years behind me than there are ahead of me.  My biggest hope is that the people in those photos enjoyed making those memories as much as I did.

Four years ago the school shut down

Four years ago today was the last day of school for the year.  I guess, technically, it was the last day of in-person school for that year.  I remember just sitting on the couch that evening, because, suddenly, none of us really had anything to do.

I was talking to a co-worker the other day, and while we both agree we'd never want to go through it again, and things were really scary at times, we also have really good memories from the family times we had.  It was a blessing to be able to go through it with my kiddos and my husband.  I have memories of card games and board games, movie nights and family walks.  I'll never be sad we had all that time together.

It's hard to believe it has been four years.  Time sure does move along quickly.

Going through memories

Today was a teacher work day at my school, but our boss gave us the gift of an entire day off.  I'll write another post at some point to explain why.  We were to use at least part of the day for the self-care...and I feel I accomplished that.  I slept in until 10 this morning, which feels crazy!  Every time I woke up though, I would doze back to sleep so I must have really needed it.  Hopefully it doesn't catch up with me tonight and keep me from falling asleep.

It's been a gorgeous day so far, and I was able to accomplish two very important phone calls.  I've also been trying to reduce some of the tubs we have in storage, and this afternoon I spent a couple of hours going through my memories.  I found a tub with lots and lots of old newspaper clippings from my high-school and college years, and shortly thereafter.  I'll be honest, I was a little amused at some of the things I kept, and I'm pleased I was able to get rid of nearly 1/3 of the tub.

The memories were also a little poignant though, as so many of them were soccer memories.  Seeing Scotty's picture and accomplishments just made it ache that he's gone at such a young age.

I'm so grateful to have had today to just be with myself.  It was perfect timing and a lovely day!

I spent my weekend with memories

This weekend, I was able to spend my weekend not making memories, but feeling surrounded by them.  I spent most of the day Saturday working hard to get all of Christmas taken down and stored away (not in the attic because it's WAYYYY too cold, but in tubs).  I loved thinking about my great-uncle as I put away the Santa that he carved, and that had been a gift to my grandmother and I now have.  There were so many decorations that had been gifts from my paternal grandmother, and even a couple of gifts from my mom.  My aunt usually gives us a decoration each year as well.  I cherished putting away the tree that I had given to my grandmother one year that contained the names of her (then nine) great-grandkids, and I love the photos from many year that we've had in various frames, all displayed together on shelves.  There were a couple of decorations I've had since my childhood, and an entire ceramic village hand-painted by Andrew's grandmother.  There was also the Department 56 village pieces we have that my maternal grandmother collected.  We were each allowed to choose one, and we add them to the few that I already had.  I thought back to her opening one each year, and I thought about how she must have so enjoyed putting them out each year.

I also spent some time with a wonderful gift our family received at Christmas.  Andrew's cousin sent us digitized copies of dozens of photos.  I spent some time last evening going through them and organizing them.  Additionally, I've been wanting to re-do our photo wall in our hallway, so I've been thinking about what photos I want to put where, and what frames would look best in doing so.  I'm looking forward to adding photos of Andrew's family as well as some of my favorites of the kiddos.  I enjoyed those thoughts.

I am so grateful for this weekend.  It's been absolutely frigid, and we've been able to stay in so much.  We've had several beautiful fires in our fireplace, as well as enjoying the scents of lit candles.  I won't lie, I had hoped for a snow day tomorrow because I'm so motivated to organize, but the snow never really happened.  The windchills are going to be negative in the morning, but not cold enough to keep us from being in school on time!  We've been able to enjoy decent football games (ugh, Steelers, c'mon!), and this weekend has just been so good for my soul.  Additionally, Andrew and I even booked a weekend get-away for next weekend.  I am working on feeling peaceful.

The first day of 2024

Typing this title was the first day I've used "2024".  Another year has arrived.  It is so hard to believe.  I am fifty years old, so last evening was my fifty-first NYE.  Wow.

As a child, New Year's Eve was always so very special.  My parents hosted a gathering every year, and my sister and I would spend the night at my paternal grandparents.  My grandmother retired when I was very little, and my grandfather retired when only 11, so most overnights were at their house.  My mother always took us to the bulk nut factory in town, and we were allowed to pick out snacks for the evening.  Peanuts and other nut assortments, and always jelly beans, were served as evening snacks.  We would eat dinner at Long John Silver's, and then we would undecorate my grandparent's tree.  As I got older, those weren't my plans, but even my freshman year of college, I stayed at my grandparents.  The very first NYE I remember was 1983, and I remember walking into the bedroom where my sister and I slept thinking, "I can't believe it is 1984."  I was ten years old, and that was forty years ago.

This was a tough break, although I'll write about that another in a different post.  Today is always one of my favorite days of the year, and this year is not an exception.  I'm especially grateful as the last two years have been less than spectacular.  This year, this day has been exactly as I hope it would be.  Andrew and I spent the day in our pajamas and our meals were leftovers.  Right now I am watching Michigan play Alabama (ugh) and enjoying the candle with a lovely fire in the fireplace.  Catherine spent the day at her apartment, and Thomas had to work before going to spend the evening with his girlfriend and her family.  We are still off tomorrow, and although I have A LOT to do, but for today, I'm just enjoying the peace and quiet!

Fifteen years of blogging

I began this blog fifteen years ago.  I still remember that Monday afternoon when I decided to give it a try.  So much in life has changed in those fifteen years.  I'm so grateful for all of the memories recorded here, especially here at the holidays.  I miss having little kids, but I'm grateful for the life we have today.  When I started, there were a lot of blogs I followed that had I enjoyed reading.  Most of those are no longer active.  I get it.  Like I said, life changes.

I can't even begin to imagine what the next fifteen years will bring, but I'm sure there will be many blessings!

Thirty years ago today

It was on this date in 1993 that a very dear high school friend was diagnosed with leukemia.  I'll never forget receiving that phone call, and I'll never forget all of the emotions that happened in the next week before most of us returned to college.  To be honest, it bonded us in a way that is indescribable.  I'm so very grateful that my friend is still around and this day can be a celebration.  It seems so hard to believe that it's been 30 years though.  It definitely feels like a long time ago, but I just can't believe that I had year of college under my belt and it's been 30 years since it happened.  I feel old.

It was also on this date in 1996 that my family began to really understand that my dad was really, really sick.  He was around for another 17 years, and I'm so grateful for all the memories we made in that amount of time.

Andrew and I start with students this week on Wednesday.  This summer was amazingly fast, but I'm ready for another school year!

Eating a memory

I'm going to be totally honest, our house is on the "struggle bus" a bit.  I'm sure everything is going to be just fine in the long run, but there have been some challenges.  Today I had to take Thomas to a doctor appointment.  My sister had let me know that my grandmother was struggling to work her computer so I headed there after Thomas's appointment since we were so close.  Grandma was not having a great day, and it was tough to see.  After we left, I decided to hit this small burger and ice cream stand on the way home.  I hadn't been there in at least twenty years, but my dad used to take us when we were really little.  They had the best soft pretzels.  Thomas ordered a shake, and I wanted a soft pretzel and a root beer float.  I bit into that soft pretzel, and (although they were smaller!) it tasted exactly like I had remembered.  I'll be honest, I had to fight tears.  I wanted to pick up the phone and tell Dad that they still tasted exactly the same.  In just a few months, Dad will have been gone ten years.  I can't believe it's almost been an entire decade. 

Summer weekends are fabulous

I really enjoyed this weekend.  The nicest thing about weekends in the summer is that Sundays aren't awful, because the weeks are lovely as well.  Our Friday evening was spent hanging out, and sadly, watching the Reds lose.  The Brewers have been rough on them.

Yesterday we did a few things around here, and then drove to our former town to spend the evening with friends.  Our dearest and closet friends were there, and I always appreciate the opportunity to get together.  We laugh so much, and these friends are so dear to us.  One has had a horrible year with some health issues, and after a couple of hospitalizations, I'm so grateful she can join us.

Today, Andrew, Thomas and I decided to drive a bit and visit some antique shops.  It was a shop that my parents and I visited frequently when I was a kid.  I hadn't been there in twenty years.  The last time I was there was Mother's Day of 2003, and my dad drove us over.  Lovely memories filled my heart today, and I enjoyed making a couple of more with Andrew and Thomas.  

It's been a fun weekend.  I"m so grateful.

This date is always hard

Today is my dad's birthday.  He would be 69-years-old today.  More than any other day of the entire year, this is the date on which I miss him.  This is the day that is supposed to be all about celebrating him, and he isn't here.  I don't love this date, but I'm grateful Dad was a part of my life for forty years, and that I celebrated him as much as I could on each one.  I vividly remember his 39th birthday.  It was my first year at college, and he was going on a work trip.  It was early in the "cell phone" era, and calling outside of the cell range was pricey.  I woke up really early so that I could call him shortly after he hit the road.  I remember how pleased he sounded that it had mattered so much to me.

It's a beautiful, absolutely gorgeous spring day, but it is still a day that hurts.  It's been a rough month overall, and I hope to soon write about things happening in our lives and catching up!