A lot has happened in two weeks

After I wrote on Labor Day, I received a phone call from Lyndi and she was crying.  They'd been in a car accident.  They were okay, but it was Lyndi's fault and I could hear Thomas screaming.  He's had a bit of PTSD since his accident five years ago.  We were over an hour away, but we made some phone calls, and some dear friends rushed to be with them.  Complicating life was the fact that the care was not drivable, leaving them with only the old 2001 that we don't trust for many distances.  It needs some work.  So after a week of that, we traded them so they could use Andrew's car and we are living with the Civic.

In the meantime, Lyndi took her driving test and we were so excited when she passed!  She really is a great driver.  However, because she is married she couldn't be on her parent's car insurance, and when our insurance found out they were married they had to go on their own policy.  So she isn't covered, which means she can't drive.  It's not overly convenient for them right now, but things will work out.

Last week was also crazy in that Andrew had to work almost every evening, and we were trying to get ready for the kids' party.  I am so grateful my MIL was here.  She made sure we had meals and helped with laundry.  We couldn't have made it through the week without her.

Work has been more insane than I can even explain.  These parents have lost their minds.  Their behavior has been astounding.  Today, a set of parents showed up swearing and yelling and making demands.  What is even happening with these people?  I have been spending literally HOURS in admin meetings trying to make backup plans for backup plans in case some teachers decide to leave because the parents are so awful.

There are also things going on at church and in other aspects of life, but overall we are hanging in there.  It won't last forever, and we are all healthy and hanging in there.  But wowza, life can settle in anytime now!

I will always remember

Yesterday, we had an open house to celebrate Thomas and Lyndi's wedding.  It was nothing formal, just come by when you can.  I will always remember how my kids felt loved by the people who came to celebrate them.  I will always remember how my son shared with me that he shed tears when he opened the gift from his Godfather, who created a unique piece of art personal to them, just as my son had done for them when they married ten years ago.  I'll never forget my son calling me last evening after they got home to thank us for all we had done.  I'll never forget how much love I felt in that room, or the gratitude I felt for those that were able to make it, and also for those who couldn't be there but let us know.  I am so grateful.

But I know a person can hold two feelings at the same time.  When Thomas and Lyndi first talked about getting married, I remember thinking how I couldn't imagine having a wedding that didn't include our big extended family.  I was so grateful to have been included in grad parties, weddings, baby showers, etc., and I wanted all of them to share this day with us.  The kids agreed a format like yesterday was a perfect way to include all of them.  And I will always remember how it felt, when I looked out over everyone, and not a single one of them was there.  Not. A. Single. One.  My mom was there, and my sister was there.  None of my first cousins and their kids, none of my second cousins or their kids.  No aunts and uncles. Absolutely none of that big extended family was there.  And the worst part?  With the exception of my aunts and two cousins, NO ONE even bothered to RSVP that they weren't coming.  I'm not asking for a gift, but at least acknowledge the celebration and politely decline.  And here's the thing, you want to do this to me?  Okay.  But this was about celebrating my kiddo, who is working really hard to be a decent young person in a really hard world.  I couldn't help but think back to all of the graduations, weddings, grad parties, showers, soccer games, baseball games, football games, plays, etc. I had attended, nearly all of which were at least an hour's drive.  And I was happy to do it and so grateful to be included in most cases.  And even times when I couldn't attend a specific milestone event, I ALWAYS sent a gift.  I was important to me to cultivate those family ties.  

Don't get me wrong, I am not claiming some huge family conspiracy against us.  Not at all.  It just is what it is.  And what it is, hurts.  I'm sure Thomas didn't think much about it.  Friends were there.  And those friends who are always there and have become our "framily"?  Absolutely.  One of our dear friends drove home from a college performance in Detroit and arrived in the middle of the night, then was driving back last night.  So many dear, dear friends were there and made my kiddos feel so special.  As did my coworkers, whom I adore.  And I still love my family, but I also need to guard my heart a little.  And I need to guard my energy.  This September has been REALLY hard (a post for another time).  If this is how my extended family feels about events, then it's okay for me to send a gift and save my energy for the people who will truly appreciate it.  This Mama Bear is so grateful for the people who love my kiddos, and they are all truly a gift.

It's a beautiful start to September

Today is an absolutely gorgeous beginning to September.  Upper 70's, no humidity, not a cloud in the sky.  AND, a Monday off.  I don't think it gets any better.

August didn't end the way we would have like, with the Irish losing their first game of the season, and to the 'Canes.  But, Thomas was in the emergency room, which was far more relevant in life.  I'm happy to report he was discharged with severe dehydration, although I think it would be best if he kept an eye on things.  His system has always been a bit fragile.  I'm grateful for Lyndi, who takes such good care of him.  And I'm so grateful for my MIL and our relationship, as I have an amazing model for how to have a good relationship with Lyndi.  Nothing pulls at the heart strings though, like a kiddo not feeling well.

September is going to be a BUSY month, but I'm grateful for the opportunities in our life.  I won't lie, I've been a bit emotional about some things, but overall, life is good.