Changes

There are many, many possible changes in our future, and I haven't wanted to write about it because frankly, it has me feeling very unsettled.  And to be honest, it almost all involves my kids, and I just don't always like putting everything out there...but here goes.

It's been a pretty rough school year in some regards.  JR is in the class from, well, I'll say "heck", but you get my drift.  The average class size at our school is between 120 - 140 students.  JR's class has a whopping 196 students enrolled in the sixth grade.  And most of them seem to be rude, obnoxious, and disrespectful.  Because this class is so large, and is the only one this large, there are not enough textbooks for the kids, so they don't get one.  The district doesn't want to have to buy 60 extra books just for this one class, and our concern is that this is the way it will be for the rest of his schooling.  There has also been more than one physical altercation between JR and another student who has a history of being a trouble maker.  The last instance involved the other child being suspended from school for three days, but I'm just tired of all the crap that is happening at his grade level, and from comments others are making to me I am NOT the only one.  We have given serious consideration to pulling him out of our local district and enrolling him in the district where my husband teaches.  This is not without its own set of issues though, as it is a 45 minute drive.  That is fine on all the days that my husband is going, but what about sick days or other days when he isn't going to be going?  Now we've got to make TWO 45 minute trips...one to take him and one to pick him up.  At the price of gas these days, that's a financial issue that concerns me.  And there is also the fact that any friends he makes there will now live 45 minutes away...very difficult to be friends outside of the classroom.  However, we had already decided that we were pretty sure HT was not going to go to high school here and would probably go with my husband.  We have learned that our school district does not have the challenging high school curriculum which we would prefer for HT, and my husband's district has so many more options.  I also have family in the district where my husband teaches, so there would be help available on the days when we might not be able to be there right away.  And since both boys will probably go, JC is pretty sure that she'll want to go also.  Now of course, one might wonder why we don't just go ahead and put the house up for sale and move to my husband's district.  To start, it's further away from my parents, and with their health issues that is a big concern.  Not only do my parents have their own health issues, but my grandmothers are both still living, but in their 80's, and my aunt is having some health problems of her own.  My sister can't take care of everything on her own, and I don't want to be over an hour away from my home town.  In addition, my husband's district is a college town.  Great for education opportunities, not so swell for the "party environment".  I am way too aware of very poor choices that have been made by good kids...usually just because the frat house was so readily accessible.  It also happens to be the same place I went to college, and I ALWAYS said I never wanted my kids to live in that environment.  We've also contemplated moving closer to the district, but not actually be "in" the district.  But I've pointed out to my husband that he has only two classes to go until he gets his principal's license, and maybe we should just wait and see if he gets a job somewhere that would appeal to us.  As you can see, lots of things up in the air right now!

And on top of that, we are considering changing churches.  Now, that may not sound like a big deal, but I don't just mean we are contemplating looking for a different Catholic church.  I've been very unhappy with the church for years, but I always promised my husband that I would do whatever he needed to help raise the kids Catholic.  And I've explained to him that I will continue to do so, but that instead of feeling refreshed in my faith and at peace when I leave Mass each week, I feel exactly the opposite.  It bothers him that I don't wish to be there, and he would prefer that we worship together as a family.  I feel absolutely awful that I can't seem to reconcile my feelings with those of the church we currently attend.  We both have a strong sense of faith, and to me that is the most important thing...that and sharing it with our children.  It will all work out exactly as it is supposed to be.