It's catching up to me

Last night's lack of sleep has really caught up with me this evening.  Of course, it doesn't help that today was a rather draining day.  Talking to Thomas this morning on the phone about his time at scout camp literally made me cry (again, lack of sleep)!  He was asking about his sister (whom he adores) and about his beloved stuffed animals and how I was taking care of them.  I know that he'll be very happy to be reunited with all this evening, and I love how LOVING that little guy is.

I was also very emotional about my Dad today and everything he's been through, and I also learned it's been a very rough couple of weeks for him.  I hadn't been hearing from him at all in emails (how we usually communicate) and I wasn't sure what was going on.  I had asked if we could bring dinner in this past Saturday because it's been three weeks since we've seen him, but Mom had said that he decided he wasn't up to it.  I was NOT AT ALL comfortable leaving on vacation without seeing him and so I had asked if we might be able to stop in quickly Thursday afternoon.   That was when I learned that he is sleeping most days in the 16-18 hour range and some days it's even more than that.  I think anyone could realize that isn't a good thing.  The lung doctor is fairly certain that it's Dad's heart, although they did some blood work and another chest x-ray just to be certain.  Fortunately, he did agree to allow me to bring the kids by this week for a few minutes.

We also ended up having a full house here this evening.  Our good friends returned from vacation Friday evening to find that their hot water heater wasn't working.  They had expected it to be repaired today, but now tomorrow is best case scenario.  She had called and asked if it would be possible for her to take a shower at our house this afternoon, and as things unfolded we were able to work in not only Jen but all four kids.  It was very nice to visit since it had been quite some time, and I also enjoyed visiting with the kids.

Andrew and Thomas should be home within the next hour or so.  I'm so looking forward to having them home...and then to bed!

Best news I've had all day

I'm having a bit of a rough day here.  It's due mostly to the fact that at 3AM I was still wide awake.  There seemed to be absolutely nothing I could do to sleep last night.  I tried all my normal "sleep" techniques, but to no avail.  I was all set to allow myself to sleep in this morning because we have nothing scheduled, but when I woke up this morning I couldn't go back to sleep.  Ugh!!!!!

I also suspect it has to do with the date.  Seventeen years ago today (also on a Tuesday) my father went to the doctor and was diagnosed with pneumonia...although that was just the beginning of the journey he's been on for the last seventeen years.  The last year has been a year of tremendous decline for him...more so perhaps than any other.  He has had two lengthy hospitalizations and they've taken quite a toll on him.  On the upside, he still talks a great deal about the future and he always talks about next year.  I, on the other hand, find myself not as optimistic about the future with him, and prefer to focus on him in the now.  It doesn't help that I have a friend here in town who's father was diagnosed with the same disease this past winter, and he passed away Saturday.

I'm also finding myself completely overwhelmed by the impending move, and the fact that we are leaving for vacation in four days!  I know it certainly isn't the best of timing, but we weren't planning on moving!  When I think about the amount of work that needs to be accomplished, along with having two house payments, AND I won't be working, I actually sometimes find it takes my breath away and I can't breathe.  I know it's all going to work out, but yikes!

And of course there is the fact that Andrew and Thomas are at scout camp.  I've really, really missed them, although I got to speak to them Sunday evening and again this morning.  They are having a blast and I think Thomas has grown up a great deal in these couple of days.  And they are part of the best news I've had all day...they've decided that instead of coming home tomorrow morning, they are coming home tonight!  Apparently camp officially ends at 10:00 this evening and there is literally nothing, not even breakfast, tomorrow morning.  Because most groups travel a distance many will leave in the morning, but since our group is less than 30 minutes away from home, the adults all decided that sleeping in their own beds sounded like a better idea and they will pack today and come home tonight.  It will be so great to give them hugs!!!!

On my own

Andrew and Thomas have just left for scout camp.  I'll be honest, I almost cried!  When Robert leaves, I have complete confidence that everything is going to be great and I know that he is going to have a wonderful time.  The "baby" leaves though, and I feel like I can't breathe!  Totally overreacting, I know!  Thomas has been so excited about this.  The first question he asked when he got up this morning was "What time do I leave for camp?"  I'm so grateful my husband is able to go with him...I'm not sure I could handle this if he wasn't going to be there.  I'm completely ridiculous and I accept that.  Praying they have good weather, are safe, and have lots of fun!

Not cut out for this

I am clearly not cut out for all of this moving stuff!  I'll just be glad when we are able to close on the other house and it's official...nothing else to worry about (except owning TWO houses)!  Yesterday I gave my "official" notification to the school that I wouldn't be returning as a sub (I use quotes because I'm a sub after all...nothing major).  It's very flattering to be told over and over how missed I'll be, but it also makes me sad at how much I'm personally leaving behind.  The superintendent even came out and reiterated how sad they were to see me leave and to see our family leave the district.  I'm glad that part is over.  Right now we are also trying to get Andrew and Thomas ready for scout camp...yikes!  As much as Robert LOVES scout camp each year, I'm not at all sure that Thomas is going to be as enthused throughout the week.  We'll just see I suppose!  In the meantime, I've got plenty to do and it shouldn't involve sitting here at the computer!

'Tis hot!

Yes, it's a scorcher here!  I just checked and the heat index is 101 degrees.  Yikes!  This is the fifth or sixth day that we've reached 90 or above.  I haven't really payed much attention to it because, thankfully, I haven't had to be out in it terribly much.  Although on Wednesday when we came back from retrieving the kids from my in-laws, I did need to take a bath before we left for a scouting function even though I had been sitting in an air conditioned car all afternoon...that's how hot it was!  Andrew and Thomas leave for three days of scout camp on Sunday, but it should be a little cooler by then.

I would really like to get up in our attics and start going through things, but this weather doesn't seem to be the time to do that.  So far I've got five boxes packed...still not sure how this is all going to work out, but it will eventually!

Working hard

Today a lot got done around here.  I began packing and got several boxes packed.  It's still challenging to pack because the entire place is such a mess that we have no place to stage the boxes once I pack them, but by packing some empty boxes that are in the garage I'm hoping that can begin to be the staging area.  Of course I ran out of packing tape so I'll need to run and get more tomorrow.  In fact, I'm pretty sure that the number of errands I need to run tomorrow will prevent me from having a productive day at home.  Needs to be done though.  I also got some more painting done, and Andrew was able to get some prep work done for some outside painting.  He was also able to chop down some bushes and get the yard mowed.  Normally mowing the yard isn't a noteworthy event, but we've had some mower issues around here lately so it's nice to be able to say it's done.  Overall, there is still a feeling of not knowing where to start and since moving is still over a month away I'm not sure that I should really start.  At the same time, it's not like there is a whole lot of free time over the next month so we DO need to get started.  It will all work out...I keep telling myself that!

Feeling...yeah, that.

That pretty much sums of my feelings these days!  It's overall a good thing though...we are blessed with opportunities in abundance!  Between our house being torn up and needing to pack, lots to do...so much that I feel completely overwhelmed, don't know where to start (or continue) and so I do nothing (except sit here and blog about it)!  I REALLY want to start packing, but because the house is so torn up from improvement projects that have been started, we don't really have a place to stack the boxes that would be out of the way.  I ought to finish some of the projects, but I've kind of reached a point where I need my husband's help and he's out and about these days working on getting the purchase of our "second" home finalized.  And don't even get me started on how I'm feeling about having two house payments when I won't be working at all for a good part of this year.  For people who are NEVER risk takers...this is a big leap!

And yet I also have a complete sense of peace that this is what is right for our family, and we are very excited about our new adventures.  That is the feeling I TRY to hold onto, but sometimes it slips.  We'll get there though!

Long week, but it's all good

This past week was such an unexpected week!  Our plans were out the window and the only thing that didn't change was that Robert spent the week at scout camp.  He absolutely loved every minute of it, and frankly wasn't all that excited to be home.  He was surprisingly unenthusiastic about our big news, but I think that was due in part to the fact that a) he was EXHAUSTED and b) he hasn't been in the house yet so while he may be pleased we are moving closer to his school, he isn't excited about the house itself.

Catherine and Thomas were absolute troopers through the week.  They had to sit through house showings and meetings with the realtor and banks and then sit patiently and respectfully as the only children at the funeral service and reception on Friday.  They were very, very, very well behaved and we are very proud of them.  We took them to Steak 'n Shake for dinner on Friday as a treat, but even then they had to wait until 9:00 to eat dinner because Andrew was sealing the drive way.

Today we are heading east to take the kids to my in-laws.  Originally we were all going to be gone for three days, but with everything happening we changed our plans.  Andrew and I will be back in the morning, then we'll meet my in-laws Wednesday morning and get the kids.  Robert, ever the teen, was pleased to learn he still had a few more days being parent free coming his way!

This time next week Andrew and Thomas will be headed to scout camp, and in two weeks we'll be on vacation.  In three weeks we will have just returned from the beach and in five weeks it will be the day before school starts.  In six weeks, we will hopefully have moved.  WOW!

This was not at all part of the plan

Wednesday we had appointments to look at four houses in the town where we want to move next spring.  Moving NEXT SPRING...did you see that part?  Two were fixers and two were in our price range, not necessarily as fixers, but also not really ideal for our family, and those two were quickly eliminated from consideration.  There was one fixer that was very reasonably priced, and had a fabulous yard with a location we loved.  However, the layout was not overly functional for our family, and even spending tens of thousands of dollars in rehab (it literally needed at least $20k) the layout of the house was not going to be changed.  The second fixer was NOT in a great location.  It had a significant amount of space, but again the layout was not great.  The living areas were small and the bedrooms were huge (which is not how I prefer it to be), and there were some SERIOUS problems with the roof and water in the basement.  Our realtor had brought one suggestion with him.  A house that was not at all a fixer.  We mentioned the budget, and he pointed out that it was just a tiny bit over the fixer budget (very true) and we would not have to put any money into it.  We were still not overly enthused as it didn't have a basement, but it was on our way out of town, so what the heck?!  We had been through the neighborhood before and knew that we liked the location.  So we get there, and of course fell absolutely in love with it!  It has three bedrooms and two baths.  We were insistent that it have two separate living spaces which it does, and it was the only house we looked at that had a dining room that would fit our table.  I LOVE the kitchen, and it also has a bonus room off the back of the house for additional living space.  It has a two car attached garage, and it even has a two car detached garage that has been fully insulated and the walls are already drywall and painted...so instead of having a basement it's kind of like having our "basement" right outside the back door!  It is also a half acre lot and it has such an incredibly private setting.  In fact, the back of the lot is the beginning of a wooded section that leads to the neighborhood's common area...so no rear neighbors!

Our realtor mentioned that the sellers were very motivated.  I still wanted to take some time to talk to Andrew about it, but we decided that evening that we would meet the realtor Thursday morning and write an offer.  The owners are out of town so it was no problem for us to get back in the house to see it again and write the offer, and my mother and grandmothers came to see it as well.  They were all equally excited about it.  We put in a fair offer and headed home to wait.  Before we even got home, we had a call from our realtor with a counter offer that was not only lower than what we expected, but they threw in some major appliances as well!  SOLD!  Since everything is in move in condition and we don't need to work on it, we decided to go ahead and move and let all three kids start school there this year.  That way all of our time can be dedicated to painting and repairing a few things here, and instead of carrying two mortgages for nine to twelve months, we can hopefully only do it for no more than six.  We are so excited!  I'm looking forward to having the family all on one school calendar, and it will give us more opportunities together...not to mention the fact that my husband's 45 minute commute just became 10 minutes!  This was not at all how we had planned for things to happen, but we could not pass up this opportunity...and we just feel so very blessed at how it's all worked out!

Trust

I remember when Andrew and I were going through the classes before we were married...I was very grateful that we were counseled by a couple I'd known my entire life.  The sessions drove Andrew a little crazy, as he was sure that if we would cut out the "visiting" portion of the sessions they would be completed much more quickly!  Anyway, there was one thing in particular they told us that, for whatever reason, always stuck with me.  They mentioned they'd had this group of friends that they'd always hung out with, and at one point decided that this group wasn't good for them.  They began to extricate themselves from the group and decided in the long run it was much better for their marriage.

As we developed friends here in town, I often thought back to that.  I couldn't ever imagine that happening.  After all, we were inseparable with our friends...we vacationed and spent holidays together.  I'll be honest though, some things began to wear on me and it's not been as fun as before.  This week I mentioned to Andrew that there is one friend in particular that I simply do not trust.  I don't trust him with my children (as far as being kind or fair to them), and we've even reached a point where I don't trust him to be honest or fair with Andrew or me.  And since trust is one of the basic foundations of any relationship, I began to really look at things.  How can we be friends if we don't trust this person?  Andrew agreed...this is not a friendship that is necessarily in our best interests to continue.  We certainly aren't going to be rude and it doesn't mean that we will never hang out again, but it does mean that things just aren't going to be the same.

Recognizing the signs

We are spending the summer getting our house ready.  We are redoing almost every room in the house, although in some cases it's just a fresh coat of the same paint color (those are the projects I like the best!).  We have an appointment with a realtor this week and are looking at some houses that we might consider.  They are all "fixers" which is the only way we can afford to own two houses at one time.  And I know that I really, really don't want to do this.  I don't want to get my house fixed up and then move.  Not. At. All.

But we will.  I know with complete confidence in my heart that this is best for our family.  The kids will be in better schools and my husband will get to spend significantly less time in his car driving to and from work.  We are moving to a town where some family members live, and they are very excited to have us there.  Andrew has worked in this school district for 14 years, and we will know many, many people in town.  Overall, it is the right decision for our family.

And just in case I wasn't convinced, there were a couple of "signs" to help me along the way.  I had to take Robert to school in early March on a day when Andrew wasn't going.  It was a miserable drive where it was raining so hard it was literally raining sideways.  I also had to take him ten days later.  That was a day where, when we left, Robert mentioned it was flurrying.  By the time we passed through the community ten miles away (and only 1/3 of the way there!) it was coming down like you would not believe.  This had not been in the forecast!  We were out on open Ohio rural roads and I literally had no idea where the road might be because I couldn't even begin to see it.  I was glad I was following a school bus because I figured a) they probably knew the roads better than I did, and b) if there was going to be a head-on collision because someone couldn't see the roads it was going to involve the bus, not me!  And then of course there was the day less than a week later when our school district closed and Andrew's didn't.  I was a NERVOUS WRECK about them driving that far in that weather.  While I acknowledge that most (some might even say almost all) days are much better than the ones I've described...why take that risk?  Why put Andrew in that driving situation repeatedly when, other than not wanting to change, there was no real reason not to move?  I can definitely recognize what the "signs" were telling us to do!

Waiting for the call

On Wednesday, we learned that my aunt's mother had been admitted to the hospital the day before.  She will be 89 in August and is truly one of the kindest and sweetest people I've ever met.  My aunt's father passed away in 1998.  Since it is just Aunt Becky and her brother who never married, her mom and brother have always spent holidays with our family.  Never did an anniversary or child's birthday go by when a card did not arrive in the mail from her.  The birthday cards especially were always covered with glittery stickers and were always very appreciated.  Unfortunately, we learned shortly thereafter that it was thought she had suffered a stroke and was being moved to Hospice.  We were told to expect it to be two days.  Thursday evening my cousin (her grandson) sent me a message letting me know that she was refusing food and water and that it was expected yesterday to be the end.  Here we are on Saturday, still waiting for the phone call.  She's always been such a strong woman, and we send up so many prayers for her comfort, and for peace for the family.

UPDATE:  As of Monday afternoon (7/8) she is still in Hospice.  Her respiration has slowed and is also less labored.  We continue to pray for a peaceful passing and for comfort.

Final update:  Mrs. J passed away Monday evening.  She will be very missed...may she rest in peace.

Ridiculous rain

We are having an absolutely ridiculous amount of rain around here.  Yesterday we technically didn't receive any rain during the day, although it skirted our area and was cloudy and overcast all day, and it did rain after Midnight during the night, so the "date" received rain.  I'm not sure how we managed to get a ball game in Tuesday evening, but it was a GORGEOUS evening and a great way to end the season (as it turns out, since last night's game was a rain out).  Otherwise it rained every day this week, all of last weekend, and the Thursday and Wednesday prior...so we are on about 12 straight days of rain.  The nice thing is that the temps are staying low, although we are having to run the a/c anyway because of the humidity.  It's so ironic after a year of drought...now we can't make the rain stop!

Independence Day

God Bless America!  Andrew and the kids have just returned from the town's Fourth of July parade.   We will be gathering with friends later this afternoon and are especially excited to be able to see our friends who moved away three years ago.  We haven't seen them since Christmas!  Last night we drove to a town near my hometown and watched the fireworks.  It was a lovely setting, and I couldn't help but feel so incredibly blessed.  May everyone have a safe and happy Fourth of July!

July has arrived

I love June and it is always my favorite month of the year.  After all, we are never further from the school year then the ending of the one we just had!  June was crazy for us this year though, and while I know it means the summer is going by rapidly, I'm still happy to be here in the beginning of July.

We spent Sunday at the annual pool party hosted by my aunt.  She lives in the town we'll be moving to, and she is so excited to have us get there next spring.  I'm so grateful she's so excited!  It will be the first time in our married lives that we'll be living in the same town as family.  Of course, we've made friends here who are like family and with the kids being older we don't have the same need for family that we did before, but it will still be nice.

I've finished part of one painting project and we are moving along with others.  I'm so enjoying the unscheduled time we get this time of year.  Since I had finished with my painting last evening, we sat around and played some dominoes.  Our family has a blast with them!  And if definitely helps that the Reds were winning the game we had on in the background...fun time had by us all!