Trust

I remember when Andrew and I were going through the classes before we were married...I was very grateful that we were counseled by a couple I'd known my entire life.  The sessions drove Andrew a little crazy, as he was sure that if we would cut out the "visiting" portion of the sessions they would be completed much more quickly!  Anyway, there was one thing in particular they told us that, for whatever reason, always stuck with me.  They mentioned they'd had this group of friends that they'd always hung out with, and at one point decided that this group wasn't good for them.  They began to extricate themselves from the group and decided in the long run it was much better for their marriage.

As we developed friends here in town, I often thought back to that.  I couldn't ever imagine that happening.  After all, we were inseparable with our friends...we vacationed and spent holidays together.  I'll be honest though, some things began to wear on me and it's not been as fun as before.  This week I mentioned to Andrew that there is one friend in particular that I simply do not trust.  I don't trust him with my children (as far as being kind or fair to them), and we've even reached a point where I don't trust him to be honest or fair with Andrew or me.  And since trust is one of the basic foundations of any relationship, I began to really look at things.  How can we be friends if we don't trust this person?  Andrew agreed...this is not a friendship that is necessarily in our best interests to continue.  We certainly aren't going to be rude and it doesn't mean that we will never hang out again, but it does mean that things just aren't going to be the same.