Fifty four years of marriage

Today my in-laws have been married for fifty-four years.  More often than not, the 28th of December is the day we wrap up our visit and head home.  However, we adjusted things a bit this year and didn't come over until yesterday and will leave tomorrow.  This gave us the entire day here.  We took Andrew's parents to dinner at a wonderful restaurant.  I'm so incredibly grateful we were able to do that today.  This many years of marriage is definitely something to celebrate, and you just never know how things are going to happen next.  It was truly a lovely dinner.

Another amazing Christmas

Today was another amazing Christmas.  As I mentioned earlier, we all enjoyed the gifts we exchanged this morning, and we enjoyed the gifts exchanged with my mother, grandmother, and sister this afternoon.  The drive to my sister's house was over some snow covered roads, but the sun was shining brightly and we enjoyed the drive.  We made a quick trip to my paternal grandmother before arriving at my sister's house.  After exchanging gifts at my sister's, Andrew and I helped with the dinner preparations, and aunt & uncle, another aunt, two cousins (a husband) and kids arrived before dinner.  Altogether, nineteen of us ate dinner together.  I particularly enjoyed the opportunity to visit with family that I don't often get to see, and I always love watching the kids play with cousins.  I am so incredibly grateful for today!

A White Christmas!

We have a white Christmas!  I can't remember the last time we had snow on Christmas.  Andrew and I think it might have been 2004 when we had over a foot of snow on the ground.  We vividly remember that one!  I am especially grateful it happened this year, our last year for being a family of five.  It is so very pretty outside.  Thomas also told us he could see hoof prints! 😁

Everyone seems pleased with their gifts.  I'm grateful for how far the budget manages to go each year to help make the magic!  We still have Christmas with my mom, sister, and grandmother later today.  I'm not sure how much of my mom's extended family will join us, but I know at least some of the cousins will be there.  I plan to soak up as much of the happiness as I can!

Snowing on Christmas Eve

Our family went to the 4:00 church service this afternoon.  I don't like to attend the 10:00 service because I like the kids in bed by then, and I prefer to be settling in with a drink at that time and not out and about.  Not long after church began, Andrew pointed to the window, and we all noticed that it was snowing.  It made the lovely service seem almost magical.  By the time church ended about an hour later, things are just covered enough that it is absolutely gorgeous outside.  I hate that Andrew is out and about getting us our traditional Chinese food for Christmas Eve dinner, but he assures me it will be fine...it better be!  I also feel badly for the road crews that are now out and about on Christmas Eve.  However, I am going to enjoy the beauty of it and be grateful!

2017 Christmas Eve

Another Christmas Eve has arrived.  After not feeling well yesterday, and Catherine definitely not feeling well (doctor thinks strep as well...antibiotics have begun) we are all feeling better today.  It is also the first Christmas Eve in several years that Robert hasn't had somewhere else to be.  We spent the day yesterday picking up and cleaning the house, and finishing so many other little things so that we can enjoy today.  Andrew got up and worked out and then ran to the grocery.  We will attend 4:00 church then order our annual Chinese.  We have some specific TV/movie viewing that is going to happen this evening and we will have some snacks and beverages (adult and non-adult) as we share our evening.  I have one more present to wrap after kids' bedtimes, but for the most part we are ready and are just going to enjoy our time together.  This is might very well be the last Christmas Eve our little family of five gets to spend together like this.  We understand that Robert most likely will not be able to  be with us next year, and we don't know when he will be again.

It is supposed to snow this evening and overnight.  We won't be receiving a great deal of accumulation, but it would be lovely if we could wake up with even just a coating of snow on the ground in the morning!

Christmas Eve Eve

Today is supposed to be a fairly laid back day, and a family Christmas party this evening.  Unfortunately, that isn't exactly going to happen.  It appears as though Catherine has strep throat.  She has already been to urgent care and had her first dose of antibiotics.  I expect that she will feel better by tomorrow, and pretty good by Christmas day.

There is also a chance I have a minor concussion from hitting my head last night in the laundry room.  At the very least, I have a pretty significant bruise on my scalp.  Andrew has given me directions to stay away from computer screens, but I'm not particularly interested in that.  Since Catherine is feeling so poorly, and I'm not feeling great either, it looks as though I am going to stay home this evening.  Such is life!  I'm sure I'll enjoy some time with my kiddos and Andrew, and finish things for the holiday.

Three days before Christmas

It is only three days until Christmas.  For the most part, I am ready, although I need to get a gift put together for my grandmother.  I just haven't been as on top of things this year as I like to be, but it is all going to work out.  I am enjoying a quiet morning.  Catherine and Robert are at swim practice and Thomas is still sleeping.  Andrew and I are enjoying a cup of coffee, and the pets are sleeping around us.  I am grateful for this morning.

We got a lot done around the house yesterday.  We picked Robert up from school mid-morning and the kids were all mostly cooperative.  Mid-afternoon we headed out to the kids' swim meet.  It was nearly 10:00 before it finished, although I came home earlier in order to check in with Thomas.  It was a rather late evening before everyone got to bed.  There are a few things to do today, but I am looking forward to enjoying the holiday weekend!

Break begins...sort of

Today is the last day of school for Andrew, Catherine, and Thomas, so break begins!  Robert however, has school tomorrow.  Catherine finished late morning and we ran to the grocery.  She and Robert have swim practice this evening, and Thomas is managing at a home basketball game.  Andrew and I are planning to attend the game.  Tomorrow Robert will need to be picked up from school because there is a home swim meet that is going to last about seven hours...ugh.  They have practice twice on Friday, and I'm not even sure what Thomas's basketball practice schedule is yet.  There is definitely not a dull moment.

It is still going to be less crazy than our normal school routine, and I'm looking forward to enjoying some fun together!

A little blown away

As a member of our church's Christian Ed committee, one of the things I have wanted to do is to increase service opportunities for our students, and for our church as a whole.  Andrew agrees entirely on this matter.  One of the things we decided to do was to adopt a family from our community who might not otherwise have Christmas.  I'll be honest, when it comes to this time of year, I will whip out my wallet for just about anything.  Our family is beyond blessed and I don't ever want to forget that.

Andrew connected with the school district's community liaison and our church adopted three families...one of which has six children.  I was a little concerned that we were responsible for Christmas for eleven children.  I had no reason to be worried.  Not only was every single request filled by our church members, there were at least two families who had wanted to participate and the tags were already gone.  I am blown away by how generous our church was in this situation, and I'm so grateful to be a part of our church community.

This time of year makes me so very emotional about things like this.  I grew up with Christmas being so incredibly magical, and I want to do everything possible to make sure other children have memories like that.  I also hope that I can remember to help spread that feeling throughout the year!

I enjoy having our little town back

The college students left town yesterday!  I've already had to make a couple of trips into town today, and I'll be honest, I love having our little town back.  I am grateful for the university in the fact that we have so many positive things here because of it, but I also acknowledge that it isn't all roses...especially when they are walking around!  I am often terrified of my kids driving through campus (and unfortunately we have no choice to get into town), and it's nice not to have anyone walk out in front of us...for five whole weeks!

Five years since the tragedy at Sandy Hook

I don't think I'll ever forget the day of the Sandy Hook shooting.  It is one of those things ingrained in my memory, like when I was in sixth grade and learned about the Challenger explosion, or when I learned a plane had crashed into the second tower on September 11 and we were, in essence, under attack.  I was working in an elementary school that day, and was so grateful that two of my three children were so close by.   I can't even fathom how those families have moved on with their lives, but I guess you do what you have to do.  I am so thankful that my three kiddos are going to be home soon, and I'm grateful for each day we have together!

So excited to have the next three weeks off

There aren't even words to describe how excited I am about having the next three weeks off.   I worked today in first grade, and I absolutely love working with the little ones.  The days go so quickly and there is never a dull moment.

However, I am so incredibly grateful to know that I will be off for the next three weeks.  I can't take an elementary job for the last four days of the school year due to their schedule, and finals begin at the high school tomorrow so I seriously doubt anyone will take any time off.  And there is no amount of money that would make me take a middle school job.  So for the next three weeks (the earliest I could take a job is January 4), I get to totally focus on my family.  I get to just be "mom".  I am so grateful for that, and I am so looking forward to it!

The middle of the week

It is Wednesday!  Next week, this day will be the last day of school for the holidays.  I am so looking forward to the days off.  Even though the kids have swim every morning at 8 A.M., getting up at 7 is still sleeping in two hours!  Strangely enough, we still haven't even finalized our plans with Andrew's family...because there is just so much think about between now and then.

I was off yesterday, and I'm off again today.  Catherine had a toe nail removed last week due to an infection, and the toe is more swollen now than it was before.  We think she had a reaction to the local anesthesia that was used, but the doctor wants to see her to confirm.  I don't mind the time off, although I am spending most of it in the car running around to get things done.  I am working in first grade tomorrow, and I am both looking forward to it and dreading it.  It will be so much fun, and yet very exhausting all at the same time.

Right now I am sitting in the our family room and our sweet Abby is sleeping at my feet with Lincoln (one of our cats) curled up next to me.  I have it mostly dark and the glow of the Christmas tree lights is lovely.  I am watching the weather channel and the dishwasher is humming.  In these peaceful moments of quiet (and even mundane, and I'm perfectly okay with that!) it is so easy to remember our blessings!

Another crazy December weekend

Friday was definitely the only truly relaxing part of our weekend.  Everyone was up by 8:00 Saturday morning, which wasn't awful because Andrew and I had gone to bed at 10:00 the night before.  The kids had stayed up later than they should, but that is a learning experience for them.

Anyway, Andrew took Thomas to basketball practice at the school, and I awaited a delivery for an apparel sale we had for the band.  Three boxes arrived mid-morning, and I continued work on the other fundraiser that I needed to finish.  Robert and I ran to the bank then picked up Thomas from practice so that Andrew could be packing.  He left shortly after we arrived to go spend the weekend with his parents (he took a personal day today).  I left shortly after Andrew to go to work at my church job, and then Robert and I had to run to the grocery to get supplies he needed for a Navy commitment this afternoon.  We also had to run to my aunt & uncle's house to take care of their cats while they are out of town.  We were home for about 40 minutes before I had to take Robert to work for the evening.  I was then able to be home for another hour before I had to take Catherine to the high school for a pep band activity.  In the two hours before I had to pick her up, I spent the time sorting and coordinating the $1300 worth of apparel orders that had arrived that morning.  I picked Catherine up between 8:30 and 9, and finished the work that needed to be done at home.  It was nearly Midnight before Robert was off work, and he had managed to spill wet trash all over him so his clothes needed washed before he went to work again last evening.  I decided that could wait until morning, so we could get some sleep!

Yesterday was the Christmas program at our church.  I was in charge of being the adult volunteer, so everyone had to come along with me.  I threw the clothes into the washer before I left, and we spent the next three hours enjoying this year's program.  We appreciated that it was something different and celebrated Martin Luther as this is the 500th anniversary of the Reformation.  We left straight from the church and ventured to have lunch with my mom.  By the time we got back from that, we had time to throw the laundry in the dryer so Robert didn't have to wear totally wet clothes to work.  While he was at work last evening, I got a few apparel orders out of the house, and spent most of the time working on my Christmas cards...I am so much less father along that I want to be with them!  It was after 11:00 before Robert made it home from work, and on those nights 5:00 A.M. rolls around so quickly!

Meanwhile, Andrew was at the Steelers game with his dad, and what a great game he got to see!  I had fallen asleep assuming the Steelers weren't going to win, so when I got a text at 1:30 with an excited text about what a great game he saw, I decided I must've been wrong!  I'm so glad Andrew had this opportunity.  He recently learned about some health issues his father is having, and it makes this even more special.  As I write this, he is on his way home, and of course I pray for safe travels.

I am in as Andrew's sub today.  This evening Catherine has swim workout and then practice, Thomas has an away basketball game, and Robert has a Navy activity and then will go straight to swim practice.  I know this is the season of our life, and I'm trying to enjoy it.  It snowed on Saturday, and between that and seeing the lights on Friday, I was almost in the Christmas spirit!

Friday lights fun

Friday evening everyone was home...no one had anywhere to be after 5:00.  That just doesn't happen this time of year!  After not having the opportunity to see any Christmas light displays the last two years, I was not going to let this opportunity pass by.  In addition, the temps turned cooler and it the right time to get into the Christmas spirit.

The kids wanted to take Abby along, which meant that we would order dinner in instead of eating out.  To be honest, I was fine with it as it meant that I would be gone less and would be able to get some laundry done.  We stopped on the way home to pick up the pizzas we ordered, and everyone settled in with food (and we were hungry by 8:00 when we ate!) and we binged watched more episodes of Big Bang Theory, Season 10.  It was such a fun evening, and our family really enjoyed ourselves.  It was fabulous to be able to spend that time together, and to know that we all enjoyed it!

Everyone has eyes in a small town

I love living in a small town.  As it is, our current town, still definitely a small town, is much bigger than our former community.  It is still a small town though, and people know each other...especially when our entire lives pretty much revolve around the school, and we attend church.  We know people, and they know us.

This has been part of Robert's undoing throughout his teen years.  Before he left for career school and was attending our home high school, he never really could figure out that his father worked in the building, and I was there often.  Skipping classes and lying to his teachers was not going to go unnoticed.  His most recent round of trouble in October all began unravelling when I received a text from someone who had seen him in town.  It was actually a fairly innocent text just mentioning she had seen him with someone, but she had no idea he didn't have permission for that.  It all began to fall apart for him.

And of course, with my husband and I both working in the school (and 90% of my days being at the high school) we talk about the students and they can't get away with things either.  I had a student that I know my husband also has.  I was in for my husband for four consecutive days while he was "playing principal" last week and while he was on a school trip earlier this week.  This particular student was a royal pain in the rear.  Today I have him again in a different class.  He asked to use the restroom and I granted permission, and told him to return quickly.  Twenty minutes later he returned.  I mentioned he hadn't hurried and he responded he had no reason to do so.  I reminded him he had been told to do so, and he frankly just didn't care.  I texted my husband about it since I knew my husband has him the next period and thought perhaps Andrew could remind him.  Andrew texted back that he had a detention waiting for him for an incident from yesterday, and would definitely make sure to give it to him and mention I had texted.  It may not be nice, but I couldn't help but smile.  You just never know connections that might occur in a small town!

Nine years of blogging

It was nine years ago today that I began this blog.  It seems like it has gone by in the blink of an eye.  At the time, I had a child in third grade, first grade, and preschool.  Now, I have an eighth grader, tenth grader, and a high school senior!  I enjoy reading the memories that are here and I'm grateful that I've recorded them.  I'll never have those moments back with my kids.  I'm grateful for these memories, and for having a place to record the new memories we are making.

I've really been looking forward to today.  Not only is it my "blogiversary", but we have family plans that I'm really excited about.  The kids don't have swim this evening, and unlike last week when that happened, there is no pep band or other commitments either.  It is literally the only evening we have during this season our family has to go look at Christmas lights.  Our Mondays - Fridays are usually swim, and Robert works on Saturdays and Sundays.  Honestly, I am almost giddy about this.  We didn't make it all last year, so I really wanted to find time to make it happen this year.  Thomas wanted to bring Abby (our dog) along, so instead of grabbing dinner while we are out we will order take out on our way back into town.  In some ways, that makes it even better!  I am really excited about this evening!

A week into December

It has been December for an entire week now.  It is finally starting to feel like December with our temps, but I am still not "feeling" the holidays.  What I am feeling, is a great deal of stress and guilt, and I'm struggling to know what to do about it.

I think the guilt leads to the stress, and the stress leads to guilt.  And of course, we are parenting three teens.  Thomas, especially, is struggling right now.  Andrew had a meeting with his teachers yesterday and it did not go particularly well.  Not only is he struggling in his classes, but his teachers feel as though he is just beginning to "check out" of the entire process.  I am devastated, because that is exactly how things went with Robert...and I don't think I can go through everything again.  Goodness knows I'm not done going through it the first time!  It seems as though Thomas wants to do well, but doesn't know how to make that happen.

I can't even begin to describe how I feel about all of it.  As I told Andrew last night, I feel guilty for working so much because I'm not home to take care of other things, but I feel guilty for not working full time and adding to our family income.  I feel guilty for taking on so many different volunteer tasks and commitments, and yet I feel guilty for not doing more to be helpful...it takes a village!  I feel guilty for being too strict but then worry that we are too lenient.  I worry about things we've done and things we haven't done, so in addition to being physically exhausted, I am mentally exhausted.

I am sure nearly every parent feels this way at some point in time.  For some it lasts longer than others, and it isn't just because my kids are teenagers.  It can happen to parents of any ages, and in so many ways I know my children are lucky because I am doing the best I can, even if my best isn't always exactly what they need.  As a sub, I've been so aware of some kids who have issues so much deeper that need to be addressed before they can even begin to consider being a successful student.  All of this has led to so much prayer!

Kind of wishing it was last week

At this time last week, I was surrounded by family at my aunt & uncle's house.  In just a few hours we would be home, and the five of us had a fabulous evening snuggled up in our home.  Everyone got on pajamas, we were so stuffed that we just made a big bowl of popcorn for dinner, and our family binged watched Season 10 of The Big Bang Theory.  I actually took a picture of the kids and me because I knew I would always want to remember it.  And the best part...I got to sleep in for the next three mornings!  Even though it wasn't as relaxing as I like my Thanksgiving break to be, it was still more relaxing than our current every day lives!

This was the "easy" part of the week

I feel like all I do is complain on here these days.  I'm just so tired.  I was off yesterday and Monday...but they were hardly "off" days.  Robert had a navy commitment that required us to be out the door at 5:30 Monday morning.  On the upside, by 8:30 Monday morning I had completed my grocery shopping for the week.  Catherine also had a doctor appointment that afternoon.  Yesterday I had a two hour meeting in the morning at school, then drove to my cousin's house in northern Kentucky to deliver an item they ordered from us, then ran errands the rest of the afternoon for our band fundraiser.  Today I worked at school in the morning, then made more deliveries, then went to my church job.  This evening is more deliveries again...and then I work for the next two days.  In addition to all of the normal chaos of life, tomorrow evening is parent/teacher conferences, and we have additional swim responsibilities Friday evening.  I still need to find time to get to work for the monthly church statements, but Saturday morning Catherine is volunteering for a Secret Santa workshop at one of the elementaries, then she and I are volunteering at another band fundraiser that afternoon.  Thomas has honor band auditions Saturday morning, and Robert works until close both Saturday and Sunday nights.  Andrew is leaving Sunday morning for a school trip and won't be back until sometime Tuesday...maybe in time to attend a meeting he is supposed to be at after school on Tuesday.  I'll be parent soloing beginning Sunday morning  which really just means most of those days I'll be in my car.  To be honest, I haven't even looked to see what the middle of next week brings, because there is too much between now and then.

I don't mind the go-go-go so much.  What I do mind is the staying up late, and then being up early the next morning for a different child.  I just need to sleep!!!!

I'm not feeling it

Sadly, I don't really feel like I'm "feeling" the holiday season.  I enjoyed our time with family last week, but there was also a lot more going on then I usually prefer over Thanksgiving.  Robert had to work both Friday and Saturday night, and Thomas had basketball practice on Saturday.  In addition, we had people stopping by all weekend to retrieve the wreaths that were delivered to my house after the mixup of last week.  To be honest, it was a bigger hassle than I expected, and it kind of led to everything being a hassle.  I felt like we were in a huge rush to get the trees and decorations up Sunday, and it just wasn't the feeling I had hoped it would be.  On the upside, everything looks nice!

I'll be honest, I think a lot of my feelings have to do with feeling completely overwhelmed.  I want my kids to have opportunities and I want them to take advantage of those opportunities and to try different things.  At the same time, I'm exhausted.  Last night, Robert was up until 10:30 doing homework and then we had to be up at 5 this morning for him to catch the bus.  Less than eight hours, and definitely less than seven hours of sleep doesn't work for me.  I'm sure that sounds selfish, but it's not like I'm refusing to have these things happen.  I know we will figure it all out, but I just don't want to get to Christmas and be too exhausted and worn out (or even sick!) to enjoy the time together.  Don't get me started on how LITTLE time we will actually have together...that is another post!

It was a nice evening at home

The kids were disappointed about not seeing their grandparents last night and I know my in-laws were disappointed as well.  Honestly, it makes things a little crazy to be here for only 18 hours, but we are here, and that is the important thing.  They took us out to an amazing dinner, and I'm grateful we made the trip.  The car was TIGHT, but we all made it.  My goal was to sleep as much as possible so the time just went quickly...and I needed the sleep!

Last evening we decided to watch some of our favorite Thanksgiving episodes from the Friends television series.  Those shows don't disappoint!  I was grateful that we were still able to make a fun memory in spite of having to scrap our original plans!

We didn't make it very far

We left earlier than I had expected for my in-laws.  Everyone did a great job finishing their packing, and Catherine did a fabulous job of packing the dog (Abby gets to go with us).  I was doing the driving because Andrew wasn't feeling very well.  We had made it around the corner when I asked if the kids had packed their dress shoes.  Nope...so back around the block we went.  It only cost us a few minutes.  As we continued driving, Andrew mentioned he wasn't feeling well at all.  We stopped to fill the gas tank and to get candy bars for everyone.  We hoped something in his stomach might help.  We continued on, and the van began shaking violently.  I had the same problem last week, and we had taken it in to have the tires aligned, but the problem was still there.  We drove about 35 minutes away, and decided we just couldn't continue in the van.  We turned around to head home, and began discussing our various options.  Making everyone fit in the car could be a tight fit, although it could be done.  We have to take Abby though, and that presents some complications.  We still aren't exactly sure what we are going to do, but we decided for tonight we are just going to stay home.  Andrew felt worse the more we drove (although it could've had something to do with the violent shaking of the van) and not making the trip was a good thing.  We were less than five minutes from home when a bat (I HATE BATS) flew in front of us and hit the windshield.  Yuck and yuck!  Just another minute or so down the road, a deer ran right in front of us.  I slammed on the brakes and I have no idea how we managed not to hit the deer.  At that point, I turned to Andrew and mentioned that this trip could not end soon enough.  We did finally make it home safely, and unloaded the vehicle.  We still aren't exactly sure how we are going to handle tomorrow.  Andrew and I could each drive a car, but that is less than ideal.  Trying to squeeze into one vehicle is less than ideal as well.  If Andrew doesn't feel well enough, I might take the kids and go, because I know the kids want to see their grandparents.  We'll just see what tomorrow brings.

It's been a little crazy

Life has been crazy, but nothing we can't handle!  Friday evening Robert came home from school not feeling well.  There was no swim practice, and I had a couple of hours of work to do in order to get the band fundraiser ready for Saturday morning.  First after I worked at the school though, I ran to the grocery...desperately needed after not going for over two weeks!  We ordered pizza that evening, I had things ready to go, and although I had to be up at 7 on Saturday, I had a decent night sleep.

Saturday I was at the fundraiser by 8:30 to hand over the materials, then I dashed to Thomas's art finale.  He then had basketball practice, so Robert and I came home to work on cleaning the house since we were having overnight guests.  We had a blast with everyone, but didn't get nearly enough sleep Saturday night.

Sunday morning our guests had to leave early, and I drove to my hometown for a quick brunch with my mother and quick visit with my grandmother.  As I was driving back to town, I received a call from the person handling the fundraiser pickup.  We were severely short on items.  I came home and checked my spreadsheet, and the totals were WRONG!  The formulas hadn't calculated correctly.  I was just sick about the entire thing.  There just weren't words.  I spent Sunday evening at a church commitment and just couldn't stop thinking about it.  I wanted to cry and vomit at the same time.  Our vendor did tell me that evening he thought he could get more inventory in, but I needed a specific total of what was needed.  I spent a couple of hours working on that Sunday night, before I continued working on a church project that needed finished by yesterday.  Robert worked until after 10:30 Sunday night, and we were tired people yesterday.

I worked in the morning in first grade, and received a phone call that Robert needed to go home sick.  I sent Andrew to get him.  I went to church after being done at school, and I also began finalizing details for the additional inventory coming in later this week.  I also needed to be working on laundry since we are leaving this evening for my in-laws.

I am so grateful to be off work today.  I had so much I needed to take care of for the band, and I still needed to pack.  I have so enjoyed this day, and this quiet.  It's been a very nice beginning to a few days off, and hopefully we can enjoy some family time!

This year's gratitude

I didn't do a very good job of continuing my daily gratitude posts.  At first it really bothered me, but then I decided that was a little ridiculous.  I know how grateful I am every day, regardless of whether or not I post it here.

I am really looking forward to the holidays, and they kick off in just six days with my favorite...Thanksgiving!  We will be heading to my in-laws on Tuesday and plan to return to my aunt & uncle's house on Thursday for the meal.  In the past couple of years, we've had a fabulously unscheduled weekend afterwards, but I don't think it is going to work out that way.  I am grateful for the time we are going to be able to spend with family.  I am trying so hard to remember to keep things peaceful!

Honor roll

Yesterday morning I was able to attend the high school honor roll breakfast because Catherine made the honor roll!  She had done so in the first quarter of last year as well, but that breakfast was held the morning she had her oral surgery.  She struggled in science the rest of the year, and worked so very hard on her grades this quarter.  I was so honored to sit there and see her walk across the stage.  I am so proud of my girl.

Andrew and I commented that we have seen a little bit of maturity occur in her the last couple of weeks.  I know she has also struggled with some relationships, and because her brother has been challenging at home, it has caused her to struggle a little more.  Overall though, she is an amazing young person.

Unfortunately, her day did not go as she wanted in the afternoon.  Andrew took her to take her test for her temporary driving permit, and she did not pass.  She was so upset and cried for quite a bit.  She had waited so long, because after her grades in the second semester of last year we told her she had to wait.  She came home more determined then ever to study and be successful next time.  I am proud of her determination, and I know she'll be fine.

Our calendar makes me want to cry a little

Our schedule has been insane, and I'm not sure how much longer we can keep this up.  I know though, that it is what working families with busy teens deal with all the time.  I'm just a person who needs my sleep, and right now that isn't happening.  I'm going to assume most people are not interested in this post, and that is okay.  I'm writing this because one day I'm going to think I'm so busy, and I want to be able to look back and realize that isn't really the case.

It all began Saturday morning...yep, on the weekend!  Andrew had to be at church at 8AM to help set up for a memorial service.  Catherine had to be at the senior's center at 9 to volunteer to rake leaves for seniors.  Andrew came home long enough to grab Robert so they could attend the beginning of the service and then duck out to get to a Veteran's Day ceremony.  Thomas had to be at basketball practice (he is managing for the 8th grade team...all of the responsibilities with no playing time) at 10:30.  Catherine needed picked up at Noon.  Andrew and Robert were able to pick up Thomas at 1:00 from his practice.  Andrew then took Catherine to urgent care because she had a grossly infected toe.  He also picked up things we needed for friends who were coming over that evening.  Obviously, I was cleaning the house while all of this was happening because it had been forever, and I also had to tabulate totals for a band fundraiser that had to be submitted that morning.  Catherine had a friend over to spend the night, and some adult friends came over as well.  Robert ended up being called into work and he was picked up about 9.  It was a crazy Saturday.

On Sunday I had to be up earlier than normal because I was the Sunday School volunteer.  After church, I needed to help with the high school youth service project, and Andrew had a church council meeting.  Robert worked until about 2:30.  It was by far our easiest day, except that the emotions of family tensions and poor decisions made for a very draining evening.

Yesterday we all got up and set off on our Mondays.  After working, I had to run several band errands because this evening is a chili supper fundraiser.  Andrew took Catherine to swim work out, and I took Robert to his recruiter's office for a meeting.  I was also able take care of some more band items while waiting on Robert, then I dropped his off at the work out, ran another band errand, and picked Thomas up from basketball practice.  Andrew took the other two from swim workout to the pool, and when he picked him up two hours later I was working on band paperwork that has to be finished by 8:00 Saturday morning.

Today we are all back to work and school again.  Robert has another Navy meeting after school today, and Catherine has to go with him because they need to go straight from there to swim uniform fitting that occurs right before swim practice.  I have a few more band errands to run.  Andrew has professional development until 7:30 this evening.  At 5:00 I will pick Thomas up from basketball and we will book it across town to get to the high school to set up for the band fundraiser.  I also need to get a batch of brownies baked before I go.  I have begged out of staying at the chili fundraiser because I still have a significant amount of paperwork to have ready for Saturday morning (and I'm not attending a 6:30 meeting), and everyone else should be home by 8PM.

Tomorrow is another full day!  I am working again, and then right after school I have to head to my church job for a meeting.  I have also been requested to get interim giving statements mailed out this week.  Andrew and Robert are volunteering at the college football game for the youth group, and I will need to get Catherine to swim workout at 4:00.  I got her a ride from there to swim practice because I have to pick Thomas up at 5 from basketball practice.  I also need to make a trip to the church accountant's office.  It will be a late night for Andrew and Robert, but hopefully I will be able to finish up fundraiser paperwork.

Thursday is a day off for me...right!!!  Catherine is being recognized at the honor roll breakfast at 8AM, and then I need to drive 90 minutes (each way) to pick up pies sold by our church youth group.  Upon returning I have a hair cut, and after school Robert has a dentist appointment because his tooth shattered over the weekend.  Thomas has a basketball scrimmage after school, so we aren't certain if he will be able to attend youth group that evening.  It doesn't matter though, because I am the adult volunteer and providing snacks for that evening.  Catherine and Robert still have swim practice that evening from 5:30 - 7:30.

On Friday I will be working again at school.  Thomas has basketball practice right after school until 6:00, and Robert and Catherine have swim work out from 4-5...and that is ALL.  Hopefully all of the band paperwork and church statements are finished, because we are having out-of-town company stay over on Saturday and I would like to clean the house!

Saturday brings Catherine volunteering for the band fundraiser, and I have to be there earlier in order to get things set up.  I did beg some other parents to take over from there though so I won't be spending the day.  Thomas has an art exhibit at 9:00, and then has basketball practice from 11-1.  Catherine will need picked up at noon, and Robert works that evening from 5-11:30.

Sunday our friends have to be out the door by 7:30AM so we will all be up early!  We have church in the morning, but then nothing until the evening when our family agreed to help at Family Advent Night.  Robert works from 5-11:30 again, and I'm just not sure how I am going to be able to stay up late enough to get him!  I work again Monday, but only in the morning, although we are leaving Tuesday after school to drive to Andrew's parents so I need to get laundry accomplished at some point, and I also need to make sure that the church payroll is submitted before we leave town.

I'm not sure how we got to this point.  I don't feel my kids are overscheduled...there are just more of them than there are of us!  I also don't mind helping out with all of the volunteer activities, it's just that everything seems to be coming together all at the same time!  I am a tired, tired person.  Better take my vitamins so I don't get sick at the holidays!

2017 Grateful post #12

I am grateful for my extended family.  I loved growing up with my grandparents, aunts, uncles, & cousins living within two miles of my house.  I remember being a kid and being jealous of people who traveled at the holidays because that seemed like fun.  Now I completely understand how blessed we were to so easily be able to gather not only then, but any time we really wanted to do so.  It's probably the reason Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.  For the last 20 years my aunt & uncle have opened their large home and welcomed us all for lunch.  Most of us always attended, but once my dad passed away it seems as though EVERYONE makes more of an effort.  Last year, every single family member was there.

I'm grateful for the family beyond that though.  My dad had first cousins, who are now grandparents (and even great-grandparents) themselves, and they are all so quick to share their blessings with us.  We are so lucky to have all of these people in our lives, and to get to share so many things with them over the years!

Dad has been gone four years

Four years ago this evening came the call that Dad was gone.  The strangest thing is that I had talked to my mom earlier in the day and he was having a really good day.  It seems so odd that his obituary stated he passed away unexpectedly after a seventeen year illness, but that honestly was the case.  I will never forget receiving that phone call.  It is strange to me how much of that evening is so very distinct in my mind, when it seems as though it should have been a blur.  I am so grateful that I was able to have my dad, such an amazing man, in my life for forty years.

I needed to be here today

Our family had a really rough weekend.  With three teens, there are lots of emotions and a great deal of drama, and sometimes things just get tough.  Yesterday I kind of reached my breaking point, and to be honest, I was more hurt, and cried more tears, than the day my dad died four years ago (tomorrow).  There needs to be some healing take place, and I'm just not sure I know how to make that happen for everyone.  It was just a really tough day.

Earlier in the day I had accepted a job at the high school for today.  After the way our evening went, I thought about cancelling and taking the day for myself.  I didn't though, and I am so glad that I didn't.  This classroom is two doors down from my husband, and we had the same plan period and the same lunch.  It allowed us to spend some time together, and to get some things handled.  And I can't even begin to describe how amazing my husband has been at handling things.  It also allowed me to be distracted by fabulous students, and not think about how upset I had been yesterday.  I am still exhausted from being drained and not sleeping well last night, but I needed to be here!

2017 Thankful post #11

I am now two days behind.  I will try to catch up, but honestly, life is just a little tough right now.

I wrote last about the lifelong friends for whom I am grateful.  I also have amazing "couple" friends that we developed in our former town.  Two couples specifically...Bob & Jen and Digger & Amanda.  Digger and Manda are friends who are just amazing people and are always there for us in so many ways, just like they are for others which can make it extra challenging to schedule fun time with them.  I'm not complaining, that is just a fact.  They are inspiring and such solid people and I can't imagine my life without them.

Bob and Jen have not always been the best friends and there have been hurt feelings and challenges.  At the same time, there has been lots of forgiveness, and more laughs and more memories than we can even put into words.  Our kids have grown up together, and they are a special part of our lives as well.

I am so grateful for friendships.

2017 Thankful post #10

I missed yesterday again.  I will do my best to make that up somewhere.

I am grateful for my best friends in the world: Stephanie, Chad, & Andy.  I can't imagine my life without the three of them.  I haven't seen Steph since July, Chad since February, and Andy since April 2015, but that doesn't matter.  They were all at my high school graduation and wedding, Steph & Andy were at my college graduation, and all three were at my dad's funeral and I spent the evening prior with them.  I can't imagine I have been as good a friend to them as they have been to me, and I love them all with all my heart.

I didn't cry this year

Today, our school held the annual Veteran's Day assembly.  Last year, I cried like a baby during a lot of it.  Given that my son has enlisted in the Navy, I honestly thought I would be even more emotional.  The guest speaker was also my husband's student teacher, and is a friend of ours, which I thought would add even more to the emotion.  And four years ago today was the last time I ever heard my dad's voice, so I'm a little emotional about things anyway!

I was just as amazed this year as I was last year about how fabulous the students are during this ceremony.  The principal explains his expectations, and there is no question that everyone will do as expected...and they do.  That alone makes me emotional!  There was a 2017 grad in attendance who has just returned from his basic training in the USMC.  Because Robert has missed so much school lately and has been having some issues, we decided he wasn't going to attend this year's ceremony.  I couldn't help but think that maybe he'll get to be home and in uniform next year.  I was very focused on getting pictures and videos of Kyle (student teacher) so that I could send to his wife.  Maybe that would explain the lack of tears, but I didn't cry this year!  Our school does an amazing job of putting on this assembly!

2017 Thankful post #9

I am so very thankful for my health.  I know that I should take better care of myself, and some days I truly strive to do that.  Many days though, especially right now with three teenagers, I feel like I'm in survival mode and dinner (and sometimes breakfast and lunch too!) is what I can find to grab as I'm trying to get from one thing to another.  I know how expensive medicine and treatments can be, and I need to remember that and work harder on being a healthier person.  But in the meantime, I am grateful to be as healthy as I am!

2017 Thankful post #8

I am so thankful for my job.  I've never been shy about that.  I'm so grateful I have the opportunity to add to our family income, and some months it is a somewhat significant amount.  At the same time, I am so grateful for the days I am able to be off and accomplish other things in life.  I love the fact that I often get to see my kids at school, and that I have the opportunity to know so many fabulous teenagers who are the next generation of leaders.  As an aside, I don't know that I would've been this excited about this at our old school, but here there are some truly amazing teenagers.  I'm so grateful that at this point in our lives we are able to do make this happen!

2017 Thankful post #7

I know this might sound odd, but I am so thankful for the schools.  While we miss our former town tremendously, both Andrew and I have never regretted our move in terms of the schools.  We are so grateful not only for the education and opportunities that are available to my kids, but we are grateful for the emotional support that is so readily available.  As a parent of three teens, that support is invaluable!  We could not be happier that our kids are in these schools.  I am constantly amazed by how wonderful they are!

2017 Thankful Post #6

I made it on here to catch up from yesterday's missed post!

I am grateful for my pets in life.  My parents bought a dog when I was three, and Munchkin was with us until I was a senior in high school.  She was a sweet dog, and perfect for our family.

Wally and Piper came into my life at a very lonely time.  They were only six weeks old, and they became my everything.  I can't even begin to explain how much I needed them in my life at that point in time.  They were, and always will be, my first babies.  As the twinsies (as I called them) aged, I knew we needed to add to our family.  Lincoln and Rosie joined us almost five years ago.  It's so hard to believe it has been that long.  The kids adore them.

And of course we now have Abby.  As my husband loves to point out, she has brought so much joy and so many smiles to our family.  She is absolutely a perfect dog to have in our family.  I love watching the kids interact with Abby.  I'm so grateful for the pets and how much they've added to our family!

An early November weekend

We had a busy weekend, but overall I definitely enjoyed it.  It seems so hard to believe that we are already six days into November!

On Friday, Thomas had and after school activity.  I picked him up, then dropped the other two off at their first swim practice of the season.  I dropped Thomas off at home, and he and Andrew left for our former town to take in a football game.  I went to the church office to work for a couple of hours before picking the other two up and dropping them off at a team dinner.  Because we don't trust Robert's choices right now, we don't trust him to drive very much.  I stayed in town and grabbed myself something to eat and the three of us finally made it home around 9:00.  Andrew and Thomas got home a little over an hour later.  It was Midnight before we tumbled into bed, and although we were able to sleep in Saturday, we all had places to be in the morning.

Andrew took Robert to a Navy required activity that lasted until late morning.  Catherine needed to be at school to attend her final marching band event of the season, and Thomas had art lessons.  After getting Thomas home, I took care of a few things, and then headed out the door for a weekly grocery trip.  We learned early afternoon that Catherine's band had not made finals (which we suspected would be the case).  We had all decided on Friday that after that the football games on Saturday we would all sit around and watch new episodes of "Big Bang Theory, Season 10" which had arrived earlier in the week.  We were extremely disappointed in the Ohio State game, but our Notre Dame Irish continued to roll along.  Then we sat and laughed together for a couple of hours while we watched several episodes.  It was so much fun.  Even though the kids chose to stay up, Andrew and I were in bed at 10:30.  With gaining that extra hour, we were able to sleep for 10-1/2 hours!  It honestly felt a little bit like a dream come true! 

Church lasted longer than normal yesterday and then Andrew had a meeting following.  We had lunch plans with some good friends and spent two hours visiting with their family.  We are so grateful for these people in our lives!  The kids all get along so well and honestly, they are really like family.  In the evening, the kids had a church youth group function, and I worked, and worked, and worked on my volunteer activities.

It was such a full weekend, and Monday morning came around so quickly again.  Tomorrow though, is not a school day for students (Andrew still has to be there) so even though there are tons of appointments happening, we get to sleep in!

2017 Thankful post #5

I missed yesterday because it was such a busy day.  If I get a chance somewhere along the line to do a catch-up, I will.

I am grateful for my home.  I loved our first home and have wonderful memories of the time spent there.  It was a beautiful little historic house, and Andrew and I fell in love with it pretty much the first time we saw it.  It was our first home together, and where we brought our children home to, but it was never meant for a family of five in this age.  We literally outgrew the home overnight, but remained another 7-1/2 years.

Finding our current home was such an amazing blessing.  With the exception of the boys' room, our new house is so much more perfect for us.  Our outdoor space is even more amazing then the indoor space, especially compared to our first home.  We absolutely love our house.

Most importantly though, I am simply grateful for having a home.  I am grateful for knowing where I am going to lay my head each evening, and especially grateful for the family that fills our home each day.

2017 Thankful post #4

I am thankful for my parents.  I had amazing role models growing up.  My parents were very young when I was born...just 19 and 20.  We had almost nothing when I was really little, but I didn't realize it.  It wasn't until later when my Dad began to advance in his career that I realized how little we had when I was a child.  My parents always made sure we had what we needed, and many times it was even what we wanted.

Both of my parents have an amazing work ethic.  My mom was a stay-at-home mom and took on just about any volunteer project that came along.  I don't remember many weeks when my dad didn't work on Saturday, and he worked many Sundays as well.  They were always there for us though.

Even when we became adults, my parents were always there.  We shared so many things as a family, and I can't even begin to come up with the words to describe what a blessing my parents have been!

2017 Thankful post #3

I am so thankful for my faith.  I can't imagine where I would be or how I would handle things without it.  It is just such a comfort to me, and brings me peace in both good times and bad...but especially in the rough ones!  I'm grateful for the church we attend, and that Andrew and I have found a way to come together and share our faith with our kids.  My faith is truly a blessing!

Our last visit four years ago

It was four years ago today that I last visited with my dad.  There are so many things from that visit that I so vividly remember from that day.  The weather was very similar to today...cloudy but not terribly cool.  We were moving furniture for my parents, and although Dad was very weak by then, he sat in the room with us for awhile.  We laughed so hard that afternoon about how my mom and I couldn't seem to put some desk drawers back together.  I will always remember that laughter, and I'm so incredibly grateful that was how I remember our last visit.  I also remember as we were leaving looking into the room and seeing him sound asleep on his side.  It is all so very, very vivid.  As we head into November, I feel a little sad.  At the same time, I'm grateful he is at peace.

2017 Thankful post #2

I am grateful for my three children.  Parenting is not for the weak of heart, that is for certain, but I wouldn't trade them for anything.  I can't imagine my life without these three amazing people in my life.  They make me laugh, they make me cry, and there are just so many other things to say, but yet I don't seem to have the words.  I am so grateful that God chose me to be their mother.  I have learned so much by being their mother and it has completely me changed me as a human being.  They are the biggest blessing ever!

A full five day week

This is the first five day week I've worked since 4-1/2 years ago at our former district.  Last year there were a couple of weeks where I would have a 1/2 day off, but none where I worked all five full days.  This is this week though.  It's been classes I've really enjoyed though, and I'm so grateful for it.  The tough part is that it is the beginning of the month so I have reports due at my church job and also for band, but I'm grateful for these five days, as right now there isn't much on my work chart for the rest of the month.

I'm tired though.  Monday I spent three hours here at the high school ironing uniforms before this weekend's band competition, the last of the year.  Tuesday was Halloween, and Catherine had a friend come over who needed a ride home later in the evening.  Last night, Catherine's band practice was cancelled due to the weather.  Thomas hasn't been feeling well, and we gave him NyQuil and put him to bed at 7.  We all commented on how it felt so much later than it really was, and I finally decided I was done and went to bed at 8:30.  It has been YEARS since I went to bed that early, but I am so glad that I did.  I woke up feeling so almost rested this morning!  It's going to be a crazy long day because Robert has a doctor appointment after school, and Catherine has band practice and then a community performance.  Tomorrow swim practice begins for both of the older ones, and then we are at the weekend!  Time flies by!

2017 Thankful post #1

I am planning to post each day about something for which I am grateful.  I almost hate to begin with someone other than my children, but I've decided to go chronologically by age, and I am so incredibly grateful for my husband.

Honestly, I don't feel there are words to describe how I feel about him.  He is absolutely amazing.  He is incredibly patient, and I'm pretty sure he is the most loyal person on the face of the earth.  He makes me want to be a better person, and by being with him, he does make me a better person.  He is incredibly helpful and supportive, and not just with our family, but with everything in which he is involved.  He is an amazing father.  I can't not even begin to fathom doing this parenting thing without him.  I hit the jackpot when I found my husband, and I'm so grateful for the life we have made together.

Excited about November

I can't believe how quickly October flew by.  Today is November 1...just two more months left this year!  I'm a little sad that October flew by so quickly because it is one of my favorite months.  It was warm for the early part which was disappointing, but the last week was definitely fall like.  And as always, it was absolutely gorgeous.  In fact, the leaves changed late, but we haven't had a really big wind storm so most of the leaves are still on the trees.  It is so peaceful and lovely.

October had a great deal of stress in our family, and I don't necessarily see November being better in terms of that.  But at the same time, it is the month of Thanksgiving, and that is something I absolutely love.  In fact, my goal is to write one post a day on the things for which I am grateful.  I wish peace for everyone this month!

He isn't a little boy anymore

One day this summer our family was driving somewhere in the van.  Thomas was sitting behind my husband and when I turned around to look at him, it suddenly hit me in the face that he isn't a little boy anymore.   Even though I know he is thirteen, something just suddenly struck me.  He was sitting with his headphones and he just looked older.

In so many ways though, he is still my baby.  For one thing, as my youngest, he is always "the baby".  And he has such a tender and sensitive heart, and sometimes he still likes to sit with me, and he plays well with younger kids...so sometimes it is easy to still think of him as little himself.  He still looks at the toy catalogs, and is just so sweet and innocent.

Yesterday, I subbed in a sixth grade classroom.  At the end of the day, Thomas came by to pick up his duffel bag for his after school activity.  The kids had all left, and I was chatting with another adult, when I looked over and saw this person in the doorway...my son.  My not-so-little-and-not-so-young son was standing in the doorway with his peach fuzz on his upper lip and actually some height to him.  It struck me again, that he isn't a little boy anymore.  I miss those days, but I love watching the person he is becoming!

Being band mom

For months, Andrew has commented on my role as "band mom".  I have adamantly denied that statement.  He has pointed out though, that I am the mom who was at band camp every day and I'm the one who fed the kids and arranged to have parents help with food.  I am the one who collects all the money and handles all the fundraisers, as well as being in the schools to collect information.  However, I maintain that there are many parents who do far more than I do with their chaperoning and pit crew during the season, not to mention the uniform parents and many others.  However, I am the ones the kids know.

Last week at the concert, several students handed me their sweaters or jackets as they were walking to the stage, and one even handed me her flute case.  Andrew of course was sitting next to me, and he began to chuckle.  At that point, I kind of had to admit, I might be the band mom!  Ultimately I don't mind because I really like the kids.  At the same I am ready for the season to end and just be mom to my own kids!

A perfect Saturday evening

Our Saturday morning felt almost as crazy as Friday.  Thomas had art first thing, and I had to work at the church.  The end of the month is here and that means deadlines!  I also had some band responsibilities with deadlines, and needed to get to the grocery.  Andrew and Robert came home from Columbus, and by the time everyone was home, we decided it just wasn't going to work out to go visit our friends like we had originally planned.  We hated to cancel, but in the long run, it was definitely the best decision.

Instead of being gone, our evening consisted of "fun" food (i.e. wings and potato skins) for dinner.  We had a fire in the fireplace, and watched some great football.  Everyone was tired and went to bed early (even the teens) and we were able to get a good night of sleep.

It was a really fabulous Saturday evening, in spite of the change of plans.  We needed that down time, and I'm so grateful it worked out that way!

Not the birthday I would've chosen

Today is my birthday.  It isn't exactly the one I would've chosen, although much better than last year.  Last year we had to attend a meeting at the career school to determine whether or not Robert would be allowed to remain at that school based on some poor decisions.

This year was far better, but to be honest, it didn't feel like my birthday.  I've not opened the first card or present.  Normally, we open things and have cake, no matter how late it is before we are all home together.  That just didn't happen today though.  In fact, my oldest never even wished me a happy birthday.  I worked at the middle school today and while the job was fine, I always much prefer to be at the high school.  It was senior night at school, and I had band responsibilities to handle after school before picking Thomas up from a student council meeting.  By the time we got home, Andrew needed to leave in order to be back to the high school for some football responsibilities.  I took all the kids up later so Catherine and Thomas could play with the band, and Robert could help me with my responsibilities for senior night.  It began misting after school, started raining by the time we got to the football field, and proceeded to rain harder and harder.  I stayed long enough to see our band seniors get recognized, and then I came home.  In spite of my poncho and spending as much time as I could under cover, I came home soaked.  And this is nothing at all that would be considered a warm rain.  It is bringing a cold front with it and it is down right cold.

Robert and Andrew left before the game even began as well because they have a long drive this evening.  Robert has to be 2-1/2 hours away at 6:30 in the morning, so decided last night that I wanted them to go ahead and make the drive this evening and get a motel, so they wouldn't have to leave the house at 4AM.  They left an hour before Catherine and Thomas were finished with band, so there was no opening of anything and not one bite of birthday cake.  It's not at all the worst birthday I've had, but in some ways it felt a little bit lonely!

This week's band concert

Catherine and Thomas had a band concert this week.  Generally speaking, I don't enjoy their concerts.  Often, it is a great deal of work for me due to my band volunteer responsibilities, and I don't necessarily love sitting through the music.  This week though, was something very different.  Thomas's band was second, and I love how much he loves band.  His eighth grade class is a really fabulous group of kids, and with it being a smaller group I have the opportunity to know the kids a little better.

Catherine's group was the last one.  They dressed in their marching band uniforms, and although they couldn't perform the movements of their show, they could play the music.  This is by far the best group of students that have been in marching band since I've been involved with the Boosters (Robert's eighth grade year).  I truly like and enjoy this year's marching band students, and I especially love watching how much FUN they have while performing.  They love being out there and it shows.  For the first time, I really enjoyed being able to be the band concert!

An autumn day

Today it really feels like fall.  A cold front came through overnight, and it's overcast and windy, and I love it.  I know I'm probably a little odd that way, but I just don't feel there is anything cozier than weather like this.  It helps that I'm off work today, and I don't have anywhere I need to be until Catherine & Thomas's band concert this evening.  I'm grateful for this time.

We have received a great deal of sad news within the last 48 hours.  The father of some very dear family friends, a man whom I have known literally my entire life, took his own life yesterday morning.  He was in his 90's and although his physical deterioration had been slow, mentally the deterioration had been rapid.  We also learned this morning that that a lady from church who has worked with Andrew for years passed away this weekend.  It wasn't unexpected, but still sad.

We also learned the results yesterday of my aunt's lymph node biopsy.  Only one lymph node has cancer, but it is still one more than we had hoped.

With all of this sadness, I am grateful for some down and alone time today.

Focusing on us

It was a rather rough weekend in our house.  For privacy, I will not divulge much info, but I will state that we would appreciate any good thoughts and prayers that could be sent our way.  There was a lot of stress and a lot of sadness, but there were good moments as well.  Saturday evening, Robert wasn't home, and the four of us that were really took the time to focus on us.  I hate the circumstances that brought us to that point, but I am grateful that we rallied around each other, and really just tried to enjoy the four of us being together.  In fact, we even had a family slumber party, and all four of us slept in the family room together.  That may sound odd, but Andrew and I both mentioned it actually brought us a great deal of comfort to wake during the night and see us all together.  Even Abby the dog joined us!  We spent yesterday morning just being together and focusing again on each other, before we needed to start dealing with the realities of the world again.  Before anyone panics and worries too greatly, I think for the most part, things will be okay.  I'll always be grateful for my family, and for our time spent together!

A bittersweet end to football season

Normally, as a coach's wife, I look forward to the end of football season with eager anticipation.  I always look forward to having my husband back, although coaching middle school isn't nearly as awful as coaching high school in terms of the time commitment.  Still, I enjoy when the season is over.

This season of course, had the added element of Thomas playing.  This Wednesday was the last game, and although the team had managed three ties, they had four losses and no victories.  Things started out fabulously with a touch down on the very first play of the game, but ultimately things didn't go our way.  Thomas was in for a few plays on the punt team and was also in for some other plays.  After the game, the team huddled in the end zone, and then I was there to greet Thomas as he walked off.  He had tears in his eyes and when I asked him why, he replied, "I just didn't want the season to end this way."  I just gave him a big hug because I understood.  I hated that at no point had he been able to experience victory on the football field, and of course I also know that my husband feels responsible for that as well (although I tell him he did the best he could with what he had to work with).  Thomas had some cookies and cheered up, and we all went home. 

Andrew was a few minutes behind us, and I greeted him in the driveway with a big hug.  Of course I am grateful that the season's responsibilities are over, but I do wish they had been able to get a victory.  I also know that the moments Andrew and Thomas had together were special, and I'm so grateful they had them.  It was by far, the most bittersweet ending to a football season I've experienced.

A sadness I remember all too well

This weekend, there was a teenager killed in an accident from a town in our region.  What makes this especially sad, is this little community just lost two teenagers in August...three teenagers lost in just nine weeks.  That is a lot to deal with in such a short time.  Sadly, I remember those feelings from my own high school years.  In my four years of high school, we lost six teenagers, and another three were killed during my 8th grade year.  That is nine teenagers from August, 1987 - December 1991...and that is entirely too many.  I remember the last one in 1991.  Jeannette was the one I was personally closest to, and as we gathered together at a friend's house, I remember thinking it had to be it.  Our little town couldn't take anymore.  I know that those experiences had a profound impact on who I am and how I react to things.  It's a lot to deal with, especially for teenagers who don't always know how to process their emotions.  My prayers are with the victim's families.

He ran his last cross country race

Saturday morning was the league meet for the cross country season.  Of course, before the race, we had caught Robert in another lie regarding how he wasn't where he was supposed to be (the downside to him having the freedom of a driver's license).  The hard part with him is that he is insistent on going down swinging, and even though I am standing there calmly explaining the evidence, he keeps with his story.  Honestly, it is insulting how stupid he seems to think we are sometimes, but that's another story.  We knew this was going to be Robert's last race of his high school career because many teammates were running faster and he wouldn't get to compete in districts next week.  Robert ran his second best race of the season, but it was still about 90 seconds off of his personal best time.  He just couldn't keep himself together after the race.  The emotions of everything just became too much for him.  He was so disappointed in himself and his performances this year, and there would be no more opportunity to improve.

It seems hard to believe that we are reaching this season of "lasts", but it is time.  It definitely needs to happen.  It is definitely time for Robert to move on to the next phase of his life.  Hopefully there will be some successes in swimming or track, but in the meantime, it is hard to see my child hurting.

Twenty five years since high school

This weekend I returned to my hometown for my 25th high school class reunion.  I was really looking forward to the opportunity to catch up with others.  There were only about 25 classmates there (along with spouses or significant others), but I really enjoyed seeing those that were there.  It just seems so hard to believe that an entire quarter of a century has passed since high school.  Many of us have teenagers ourselves now.  A few have children whom have already graduated from high school, and a couple are even grandparents themselves already!  I wasn't overly close with the people in my class, but we share a common childhood that can't be changed.  It was a fun evening.

A "little extra" to our weekend

I am off today, and it is the first Friday I have been off this school year.  I could have chosen any number of jobs, but I had my doctor appointment this morning.  Robert's career school was also closed today (which meant sleeping in about 40 minutes) and Andrew took a sick day for my appointment as well.  That mean 60% of our family was off today!  Because of my doctor appointment this morning I didn't really feel I could relax and enjoy the weekend until after my blood was drawn (I really don't care for needles) but by mid-morning I felt I could officially enjoy the weekend.  And by three of us being off today, it was a little something extra to our weekend as well!

Going to bed hungry

This morning I was scheduled to have some blood work.  Nothing at all is wrong, it has just been about nine years since I've had a routine check up.  I'm not getting younger, and I just felt it should be done.  Staying on top of one's health is never a bad thing.

Of course, having blood work done means nothing to eat or drink (except water) after 8:00 the evening before.  I was the scheduled weekly volunteer for Thomas's youth group last night which meant we had to be there at 7 and wouldn't be finished until 8:30  Our spaghetti dinner was the last thing I ate in the 6:00 range.  Because I don't particularly care for spaghetti, I don't eat a whole bunch, and when I went to bed last evening my stomach was really growling...and I knew it would be another eleven hours before I would eat again.

But here's the thing...I knew I would eat again in eleven hours.  And my breakfast would be filling and fabulous, and I could choose from one of many things available in my kitchen pantry.  I couldn't help but think of all the people, especially children, who go to bed night after night feeling the exact same stomach rumblings as I did, and who DON'T know that they get to eat a substantial, satisfying breakfast the next morning, or even at any point the next day.  It was truly a wake-up call to me, not only to remember to count my abundant blessings, but to be a difference to those not as fortunate.  I hope I NEVER forget that moment.

I just don't love middle school

One of the things I love about subbing is the variety in my job.  I love knowing that no matter what happens, I don't have to return to the same classroom the next day...this is true about 95% of the time.  I prefer to take high school jobs because I know most of the kids, I usually get to see Andrew and Catherine at some point (maybe even have her in class), and the high school kids are really great, most of the time.  Monday I subbed in third grade, and while it is exhausting being with the younger kids, I really do enjoy the early elementary levels as well.  They are are crazy, but still mostly sweet.

Tuesday was a day in middle school.  Two weeks ago when I subbed in a business class, I had to send a child to the principal for being rude and disrespectful.  Overall, I just don't love middle school.  I had taken the business job just because it was business, and I had taken this week's middle school job because it was social studies.  By the end of the day though, my dislike for middle school students as a whole was reaffirmed.  I can't even begin to describe it, but between the hormones and thinking they know it all, and yet the childish behaviors that still happen, I just don't like middle school!

A disappointing cross country season

This weekend is the league meet for cross country.  Honestly, it has been an incredibly disappointing season.  I'm not even entirely sure what has gone wrong.  Robert ran this summer and was in shape, and of course we even sent him to camp for a week.  The very first meet of the year he developed blisters on his feet, and honestly, it never really got better.  He has had some cramps in a couple of races, and one race he told us he fell twice.  He is coming in about 10th on our team and running about two minutes slower than we would have expected.  We had really thought our team could be competitive at league this year and I do think it can, but Robert isn't really going to get to be a part of it.  Barring some sort of odd miracle, this Saturday at league will be his final race because only the top seven runners on each team get to run at districts.  The season sure feels like it has gone quickly!

Proud of my kiddos

Last week we learned that Catherine had been selected as one of the classroom reps from her food class to the FCCLA board.  We are so proud of her for getting involved like this, and it is exactly what we had hoped would happen when we encouraged her to take the class.  We are hopeful this will be full of opportunities for her.

Thomas decided to run, and was elected, as the vice-president of the middle school student council.  He mentioned last week no one was running against him so he would be it, but it became official yesterday.  Hopefully all goes well, as he and the elected president do not get along.  Apparently this young man is a trouble maker, and Thomas had informed us last week there was no way he would win.  He did though, because according to Thomas, "Apparently everyone wants a trouble maker as their student council president."  Thomas told me that this young man tried to fire him twice yesterday, but clearly doesn't have the power to do that.

And in spite of the not-so-great choices that Robert is making, we are proud of him as well.  He witnessed a car accident last evening on his way to pick up Catherine from band practice.  He had immediately pulled over to see if everyone was okay, and was calling me to see if he should leave or if he needed to remain at the scene.  I asked some questions, and when he mentioned that one guy ran a red light I told him to stay and give a statement.  The officer was grateful for the information and was impressed with Robert.  I was proud of him for checking on everyone and being so responsible.  These are the choices we want him to be making!

Homecoming 2017

This past weekend was Homecoming at our high school.  Robert had originally had a date, but she changed her mind about three weeks ago.  I'm not sure of the details, but it is what it is.  Catherine and a friend decided they wanted to go and hang out at the dance.  Catherine even told me she would just wear the same dress from last year, but I found a classic black dress and was able to score some fabulous discounts and purchase it very inexpensively.  She already had great shoes to go with it, so she was all set.  The girls didn't even want to go out to dinner!  I dropped them off at the dance, and Catherine texted about half way through asking if her friend could spend the night.  I'm glad they had fun and I'm grateful for this young lady.  She has really helped to bring Catherine out of her shell, and we hope that we can see more of her around our house!

Can't believe we have the a/c on this late in October

It's true...our a/c is running!  While it definitely is not that the temps are soaring, the humidity is wretched.  Yesterday, I felt like everything in the house was sticky, and it was getting really warm, so we just decided to turn it on.  It also isn't getting very chilly overnight, so this helps us to sleep better.  We are heading into the second week of October, and I just can't believe it.  It looks as though we will be able to turn if off when the rain stops, although this is the remnants of Hurricane Nate so the rain isn't stopping anytime soon.  Looking forward to some cooler and cozy weather soon!

It was just a tough week

I think when you wake up on a Monday morning to news of what will turn out to be the largest massacre in modern American history, it's no surprise that it's a tough week overall.  Today I subbed in three different English classes.  I enjoyed the day overall, but it meant that I had to watch the end of Of Mice and Men three times.  Honestly, it put a pit in my stomach this morning.  And of course, it was a week with very little sleep.  I'm grateful we are at the weekend, but honestly, it is bringing up some other tough emotions.

This weekend is Homecoming at school.  The kids at school are all excited about their plans...their dinner and the dance, and for some parties that are afterward.  Catherine is attending the dance with a friend, but they are only going to the dance.  Robert is not attending at all.  It's a little heartbreaking to witness my kids being so socially awkward.  I know in the long run they are okay, but for right now, it's just been a tough emotional week.  No matter what though, we have each other!

Being a coach's wife

I have been a coach's wife pretty much since the time I got married.  Andrew had coached football while we were dating, and although he took two years off right after we married, he started coaching again after those two years.  Even in the years since he gave up coaching high school football, he was often coaching one of our kids in an activity.  The man is a coach.

I learned early on about being a coach's wife.  At the high school games, the coaches' wives and families always sat together.  It basically was the assistant coaches' families sitting in a ring around the head coach's family.  The coaching families don't necessarily want to sit near players' families, because sometimes there is complaining about the coaching.  I can speak from experience when I say it can be challenging not to take that personally.  The players' families don't want to sit the near coaching families either...it is a mutual understanding.  The head coach is the one really making the decision, and that is why his family is the most insulated.  It is an unspoken part of the coaching experience.

Things tend to be a little better at the rec league, and of course certain sports tend to bring on less ire than others.  Football though, is one of the most challenging in my opinion.  There is never a lack of opinions from parents in the stands about how things should be done.  I am a player's mother, but I am also a coach's wife, and our son is not a talented player.  It is an interesting dynamic in our lives right now and to be honest, it is one I won't miss when the season is over!

Lots of emotions and some tears

Thomas had another football game last night.  I left Catherine in town with the dog (which made her happy) and took Robert along with me.  We arrived just in time for the 8th grade game to begin.  It was a really, really good game.  I watched Thomas shadow his father throughout the entire game.  Andrew had told us a story a couple of weeks ago about wanting to put a player in the game and couldn't find him, and Thomas was not going to let that happen to him.  Thomas was almost always nearly just two or three steps away from his dad during the entire game.

It was an amazingly close game, and was a scoreless tie at halftime.  I know that doesn't sound very exciting, but it actually was.  Our team couldn't get much going offensively, but had put up some amazing defensive stands.  The game was still a scoreless tie at the end of the third quarter, and Thomas hadn't yet taken the field.  I knew this was problematic, as Thomas is not at all talented, and it can be challenging to not have your best players in during close games.  As I watched our team punt with three minutes left in the fourth quarter, I knew Thomas wasn't getting in the game, and I could tell, even from the stands, that Thomas knew it too.  My heart began to hurt and my eyes began to fill with tears as I could see Thomas's reaction on the sideline.  The tough part is that Andrew has always made a commitment to get every player into the game, and usually for at least two series.  But there was his own son who hadn't touched the field.

The opposing team began to drive down the field, and the tensions were high at the end of the game.  When it looked like we had them stopped, a penalty was called on our defense that gave the opposing team more chances.  The game came down to a play with 16 seconds left.  It was fourth down and they needed only about six yards to get into the endzone.  Our defense held though (while I was holding my breath) and we took over on downs.  All we needed was to make sure we could snap the ball and get out of the endzone and the game would be a tie.  While not a moral victory, the goal line stand was incredible and our team was excited.  Between the stress of watching the game and hurting for my son, I was really fighting the tears.

Thomas walked up and I could see the hurt on his face.  He was trying so hard not to show his emotions, but they were evident on his face.  I asked if he was mad at his dad, and he said he was.  I reminded him that he had played the week before and that no one could take that away from him, and that no matter what he was still part of the team.  He wanted to ride the bus home, so I walked over to Andrew and very tersely told him I was leaving and that I was hurting that my son was so heartbroken.

Andrew texted me when he got back to the school to let me know they were on their way home, and to ask if I was mad at him.  I wasn't angry, I was just emotionally drained by that point.  It had been a long week with my kiddos, and although Robert's stress and emotions had been brought on himself by his own choices, it still hurts to see my kids hurting.  Andrew came home and told me how angry he was as Thomas's father at Thomas's coach, and we both smiled at the dilemma of it all.  Thomas had a couple of players talk to him and he felt better about that, but it was such an emotional evening.

Between shear physical exhaustion, the emotions of the week as a parent, and maybe even due to the full moon, I'm still feeling emotional today.  But, we have almost made it to the weekend!

So grateful for this job

People who read this blog might think sometimes I'm a little "pie-in-the-sky" optimistic.  I most certainly am not, but I do try to remember my blessings.  I am definitely a worrier and I can struggle with anxiety at times, but I also try to hold onto my faith which always helps get me through tough times.

Last evening, a job popped up for today that I was excited about.  It is a freshman science job, and I always prefer to be at the high school.  It is also early release day which is a bonus!  I don't know many of the freshmen yet, but I am learning, and I have truly enjoyed the day.

As I was arriving at school this morning, I watched Andrew walk into the school, with Catherine and Thomas following behind.  It really filled my heart getting to see my family walk together like that.  The classroom I am in is two doors down from Andrew's, and we were able to eat lunch together.  I don't have to worry about missing my kids' activities or doctor appointments, and yesterday I even got to be off for the day and run some errands that required most of the day.

There are certainly plenty of stresses and struggles in life, but my "job" is certainly not one of them.  And even the struggles and stresses are certainly nothing compared to so many in the world.  When I think about it, there is no way I can't be grateful for this life!

It felt like going home

Last week I had to take both Catherine and Thomas back to our former town for a doctor appointment.  We were ridiculously early.  I tend to be an overplanner, and I had a very scheduled day so I we got into town unbelievably early.  It is a 45 minute drive, and I just never know how long it is going to take.  Anyway, we were so early that I didn't want to go into the office just yet because I knew there was no way they were going to be ready for us.  We decided to take a quick jaunt around town and specifically wanted to drive past our old house.  While I loved that house, I don't miss it.  The house we live in now is so much better for us and it honestly feels like a dream come true.  Regardless, we drove past the house and the kids commented on a couple of changes they noticed.  I think Thomas misses the house a bit, and I know that we all miss that town.  As we were driving around town, I couldn't get over just how much it felt like we were "home".  It's different there, and I can't explain it.  Andrew has always said after the kids graduates he wants to move back there, and maybe we will.  It will always be a special place to me.

Sometimes all you can do is pray

Sometimes all you can do is pray.  I've felt that way about the recent hurricanes.  We donated money for relief efforts, but mostly we prayed.  I've felt that way about my grandmother and aunt, both of whom have recently been diagnosed with skin cancer.  Aunt Cathy has melanoma and is the more serious of the two.  I've offered support in terms of transportation and other things, but sometimes the best thing I can do is pray.  I awoke to the horrifying news of the shooting in Las Vegas.  At this point there seems to be nothing to do but pray.

As a parent, sometimes all that can be done is praying.  It is especially true of our oldest.  He is making less-than-great decisions again.  Not nearly as awful as they were a couple of years ago, but not good ones either.  Honestly, it just comes down to the fact that he still thinks he has his life all figured out, and he is still intent on doing things his way.  His way always seems to be the harder way, but at some point we just have to let him learn and figure it out on his own.  Those are definitely the times when all you can do is pray!

October has arrived!

September felt like a very long month.  It wasn't that anything necessarily awful happened, it just was extremely busy.  October has all of the same activities, but with the exception of band, the activities end by about 2/3 of the way through October so there is some breathing time at the end of the month.

October is also usually a gorgeous month, and the beauty of the month fills me with such peace.  I can't even describe it most of the time.  Right now we are going to have a really warm week, but it should start to cool off by early next week.  We had a fairly cool weekend and I love having the candles lit.  I'm ready for this month...and hopefully it doesn't disappoint!

Nothing to really enjoy about this game

Today, the Redhawks are playing at South Bend.  Honestly, there is nothing I am going to enjoy about this game.  As an underdog, I would love to see my alma mater knock off a big school, especially in their home.  However, as an Irish fan, there is no way I can root against them.  One way or another, one of "my" teams has to lose this game.  Ugh!

Yesterday was a real day off

I only worked 2-1/2 days this week, which is my minimum goal for the week.  I had to be off Tuesday because Thomas and Catherine both had a doctor appointment in the afternoon, and I had a meeting in the morning.  I also had parent/teacher conferences in the evening for Catherine, and because Andrew worked late I was the sole transportation for everyone.  It wasn't exactly a day "off".  I was willing to work yesterday, but the only jobs available were in phys ed and special ed.  Since I had worked such a great deal and have a good number of jobs scheduled, I allowed myself to be picky.  I didn't take a job.  I stayed home and I SLEPT.  I slept for several hours in the morning, then I went to the church office to complete payroll and a few other smaller items.  After finishing my job there, I came home and slept some more!  I had no idea I could sleep that much, but I definitely needed it.  I even still went to bed and fell fast asleep at my normal time.  Even with all of that sleeping, I still managed to get two loads of laundry finished, get dinner made, dishes done, and the house picked up.  Yesterday was much needed in many, many ways!

Sharing game moments with his dad

I watched with such mixed emotions at Thomas's game Wednesday evening.  Part of me couldn't wait for him to get in the game.  At the same time, as long as he was on the sidelines it seemed much safer for him.  He was basically his father's shadow as the game started.  I know part of it was that he heard his dad tell a story about how he wanted to put a player into the game last week, but that player was challenging to locate so he sent in someone else.  Thomas wasn't taking any chances on missing his opportunity!  He also knows that is a good way to learn things that are happening.  The game quickly turned into a blowout (not in our favor) and I know Thomas would have his chance.

My sister had come to watch the game, and Catherine was sitting with us also.  Robert was working on the chains and I'm not even sure if he got to see much of the action.  The very first play Thomas was in he lined up as a receiver (which means it was a running play...he probably isn't going to actually touch the ball this year).  As soon as the ball was snapped, the defender came across the line and absolutely planted Thomas.  I didn't actually see it happen, but I did see Thomas pop right back up and run down the field.  I was very proud that he made that decision.  He was in for an entire series in the second quarter and another minute at the end of the game.  No matter what happens from this point forward,  Thomas will be able to say he was a football player!

Weather Change

The cold front has come through!  It is an absolutely spectacular day.  I am sitting on the couch not only wearing a sweatshirt but with a blanket as well.  It is sunny, and just the perfect fall day.

It is also a fabulous day to be off.  I could've taken either a P.E. job or a special education job, but those aren't jobs that I really like.  I hate to turn down a job, but Andrew is amazing and understanding.  I had some really bad dreams last night and woke up feeling so unsettled, so I'm very grateful I've had this morning to myself.  I still need to head into the church today, so it isn't like I'm not earning any money at all.  I am so grateful for this life.

Game Day

Today, Thomas gets to play in his very first football game.  He needed a little longer than many to get through concussion protocol, and the time has come.  I'm very grateful that this evening also happens to be a home game.  I am going to be working in the concession stand during the 7th grade game, and then will be in the stands, along with Robert and Catherine (and most likely my sister) during the 8th grade game.  Thomas is so very excited about this game, and I am very excited for him.  We all know that he isn't going to be a star player, and we don't even expect him to play next year.  But for tonight, he gets to be a football player, and that is something he will always have in common with his dad, and he'll always get to say he played.  I am excited for him, and I am definitely glad it will be cooler by his game time (fall is kicking in).  I will also be very happy when the game is over and he is safe and sound!

Waiting for it to feel like fall

It has officially been fall for about 67.5 hours.  It has felt like fall for exactly zero of them.  The heat is still in the upper 80's, and many days have a heat index in the 90's.  Yesterday was pretty miserable at the church.  Only our sanctuary and office have air-conditioning.  The rest of the church, specifically the classrooms, do not.  That is a big reason we do not have Sunday School between Mother's Day and Labor Day.  Yesterday though, there was class, and it was hot.

It also feels ridiculous to put up the fall decorations.  I usually wait until October to put up Halloween anyway, but I like to try to put up fall by the middle of September.  There is nothing fall-like right now, although that should change by the middle of the week.  In fact, it will probably change just in time for me to attend Thomas's football game on Wednesday, but sitting in the rain as the cold front comes through.  It will be worth it though!

I Hate Bats

On the mornings that I have to work, Andrew gets up and takes Abby on a walk.  It is the only way we can make our mornings function well.  Andrew doesn't mind, he enjoys walking with Abby.  I don't mind walking with Abby, but I truly dislike walking with her when it is still dark.  I realize I live in a very safe neighborhood, but as a smaller woman, I'm just uncomfortable in the dark.  I know that I have Abby with me, but she is hardly a ferocious guard dog.  In fact, when she sees people she begins to cry and likes to roll over on her side because she wants love and attention...hardly intimidating!  I'm also marginally concerned about the wild animals that are in our neighborhood that haven't yet been scared away for the day.  And now, I find out a bat flew right in front of Andrew's face the other morning.  I. Hate. Bats.  I understand they have value in the ecosystem, but I hate bats.  Some people have an unreasonable phobia of spiders, mine is of bats.  I maintain though, that it isn't completely unreasonable, as bats can bite you (and you might not even realize it!) and they can have rabies.  So, in spite of the fact that Abby and I have been up since before dawn, she didn't get her walk that early!!!