An April unlike any other

April of 2020 is certainly going to be memorable, and yet not.  As much as I'll never forget this experience, the days are all pretty much just one giant blur and there are very few that distinctly stand out.  They have been filled with much love and laughter amongst the four of us, and I'm incredibly grateful for that.

I've not had to be up before 9:00 at all this entire month.  I don't think that has ever happened before.  I can't say I'm complaining about that.  I do love my sleep.

I look forward to being about to be out a little more, which seems possible in May, but I'm also realistic the virus is still among us.  As a homebody, I have appreciated the excuse to stay at home, and I'm grateful home is a safe and cozy place to be.

This is certainly quite an experience!

A family afternoon outside

I've been longing to be near water, especially since our vacation to the beach is 50/50 at best.  Right now no visitors are even allowed onto the islands, so we'll see what happens in the next month.  The state park near us has a lake.  It was a gorgeous day, and after Andrew was done with school work, we ventured out.  Our sweet Abby went with us, and it was fun that we all got to be together.  It was muddier in the grass than I expected, and the beach area was much more crowded than I expected.  I'm not a trail walker, so we didn't stay as long as I thought we might.  We did take another walk around the neighborhood this evening as a family to enjoy as much of this beautiful day as we could, and then Andrew and I enjoyed a beverage on the front porch as dusk set in.  I enjoyed our afternoon together!

Thinking of my dad as we stayed really busy today

Today would've been my dad's 66th birthday.  It's true that time does help.  It doesn't hurt nearly as much as it used to, but oh goodness, I still miss him so much.

I really felt like we "channeled" him today, and I have no doubt he was smiling upon us.  Andrew worked on school stuff pretty much all day.  Anyone who thinks teachers are "on vacation" clearly doesn't know (or respect) teachers very well. Yes, he has some added flexibility and isn't getting up at 5AM, but he is working just as hard, and maybe even harder than he would under normal circumstances.  He is truly concerned about his students learning the material, but he can't instruct them the way he normally would.  So he is scouring for additional resources as well as learning new technology, and things just take longer.

On my end, I made five face masks today.  Ironically enough, the first one was actually the best looking one I made, but that was because it was thin material and and thin thread.  I used heavy duty thread and heavier material on the rest of them.  We couldn't get our sewing machine to work so I am hand sewing them.  I really don't mind, but I'm just not used to this.  I want to make each of us another one, as well as one or two for my mom, and send a couple to my in-laws as well.  I think I have enough material to do that.  Hopefully tomorrow the kids will be a little more willing to help as well.  I don't love wearing them, but I do appreciate the benefits to society.  And maybe they will make great graduation gifts as well!

I don't know anybody in my life who works harder than my dad did.  As I sit here reflecting on the day, I can't help but feel peaceful.  And for that, I am grateful.

Our routines during these days

One day often morphs into the next around here, and that is really okay right now.  It has to be.  We've established a routine, and I am grateful for that.  Not that anyone cares, but for posterity, I am going to record our general routine for "school days".

We get up about 9.  Andrew is often up before that, but I see no need to rush.  He takes the dog out when he first gets up, eats breakfast, and heads directly to the computer to begin his school day.  Once the kids have done their morning chores (which is only taking care of the animals), they eat breakfast and are allowed to have phones/screen times until 10AM.  At 10, they begin their school work.  At Noon, they take a break, and are allowed phones/screen time for an hour.  At 1, they might get back to their school work, or we might play a game.  Andrew is usually on meetings on doing food distribution about this time.  At 2:00, I am generally in front of my screen watching our governor's daily update.  About 3, most of the school work is done for the day.  This is usually a time for outdoor activities, or another game, or another task we are hoping to accomplish.  If it is yucky outside and work is completed, we might allow some TV time.  No phones are given back until 5 at the earliest, and if everyone is contributing to dinner, it might even be later.  We usually eat dinner around 6 or 6:30, and then there is definitely more family time.  It might be a walk or a game.  Sometimes we have something else we are trying to accomplish, and that usually means it is a family movie night.  Kids are not allowed to be staring at their phone while we are having family time, and phones get put away at 10PM.  I am trying very hard to keep them from becoming couch potatoes whose minds are sucked into their phones and various social media.

Of course there are many variations to this day.  Andrew and I occasionally have meetings, and Catherine has a work schedule.  I appreciate that we have a bit of a routine, and I'm grateful for all this extra time together!

Six weeks at home

It seems so hard to believe that six weeks ago today was our first day at home.  Although I knew we weren't going back to school in just three weeks, I also realize that we didn't really truly understand what was about to happen.

This has been a tough week for very many people.  It was the toughest week in our house as the reality of many end of the year losses were realized.  I know for many parents of seniors, it was the same.  I also know it was a tough week for many teachers, as the reality of the remote end of the year hit.  While many of us knew it was coming, the fact that there was no more "maybe" was tough to hear.

The fact that I am most likely (decisions will be made public next week) not going to get to see my daughter walk across a graduation stage, and probably not even wear a cap and gown is heart wrenching.  We will probably not get to take the trips we had planned for the summer.  We haven't seen Andrew's parents since Christmas.  I have lost a significant portion of my income for the year, and since we aren't have church services even my income there has been cut.  There is the mental toll of not being able to see anyone, and when you do happen to run into someone, you can't hug them like you might want.  There is the mental toll of worrying when you go into a store, not to mention worrying about whether or not you can buy the things you have on your list.  I realize now how we have taken that for granted for so many years.

This hasn't all been awful.  We are all enjoying a more laid-back and relaxed schedule.  We are all enjoying our family dinners and walks and movies.  We are definitely all enjoying sleeping in.  I can't believe it is the 24th of April, and I haven't had to be up for anything before 9:00 all month!!!  It doesn't mean I've slept until then every day (but many days), but it does mean we are getting pretty well rested.  I am enjoying the time to keep the house picked up and to organize and digitize many family photos.  I am enjoying appreciating the little things a little more, and I'm certainly grateful for deliveries and technology.  I've enjoyed seeing neighbors take walks, and seeing children outside.  I've appreciated that some things are just simpler.

School begins in just under sixteen weeks.  It most likely won't be the normal school we have known, and there is a chance there won't be any activities for a while even next year.  It might literally just be classes.  That is why I am insistent to just remind myself to enjoy each moment as it comes right now.

Another lovely evening with the family

Our family ate fairly early last evening.  After dinner, I wanted to take a walk on campus in town.  It's a very large campus, and easy to walk in different places and not see the same things all the time.  We walked for a little more than an hour, and then got back in our vehicle to head home.  I was driving, but Andrew mentioned he didn't want to go home yet.  I get that.  We decided to drive over to the state park, and just drive around.  It was getting late so we didn't get out and check out the lake like I hope to do sometime soon, but we enjoyed just being surrounded by nature.  It's raining buckets today, but I look forward to days we can be out and about again soon!

We took a "road trip"

Yesterday was a beautiful and sunny day.  Andrew and I had a video meeting for church at 6:30, but otherwise no one had anywhere specific to be.  We all have savings accounts at a bank that is an hour away.  It has the best rates and the best service, so that is where we choose to keep our savings.  I decided yesterday would be a great day to make the trip to make some deposits.  And the best part is that the bank is a five-minute drive from my best friend's house, and her daughter happened to be celebrating her sixteenth birthday yesterday.  We swung by to say hello from the sidewalk while they remained on the porch.  It was lovely to see them, even for just a few minutes.  It was really nice to be able to be out and about yesterday!

I shed a bunch of tears yesterday

I'm not going to lie.  Yesterday's announcement about schools hit me really hard.  Yes, I knew it was coming, and yes, I agree with it 100%, but the emotions about it all just became too much for me.  The reality that I am never again going to get to see so many of the students, this year's seniors, that I have come to care so deeply about over the last 3-1/2 years...that reality was etched in stone.  The reality that I am not going to get to work (or paid) for the rest of the school year was confirmed.  Those were tough to accept.

But it was NOTHING compared to the reality of what our senior students are going to miss out on.  There will be no Prom, and almost certainly no in-person graduation.  They will not get to gather as a group one last time, don caps & gowns, and hear the the audience cheer for their accomplishments and acknowledge how hard they have worked for the last twelve years.  NONE of that is going to get to happen to any of the students I love so much, and especially the one I love the most...mine.

I was grateful Catherine had to work yesterday afternoon.  Honestly, she handled the news well.  I couldn't get over the fact that I am never going to get to see my daughter put on her cap & gown.  Of all three of my kids, she is the one who has always worked the hardest and been the most successful.  Reality, she is the one who had the least natural talent for it as well, but she never let that get to her.  She would just work even harder when things got tough.  My heart breaks for what is being lost with this.

I am doing better today, but my heart is still heavy.  I know seniors everywhere, both high school and college, will have similar losses, but that doesn't make it hurt any less.  I know my sweet girl will still go on with her life and will accomplish what she is going to accomplish whether or not she gets to actually walk across that stage.  I know we are all safe and healthy, and Andrew is still employed, so we are far better off than most.  I know all of that, but I also know it is okay to be a little sad.

Shut down for the year

The governor has just announced that there will be no more school for the year.  I am not remotely surprised by this.  Yet, I am sad.  I miss all of the kids so much, and let's not forget that I have two of my own, one of whom is a senior.  She realized that this definitely meant no Prom.  She is such a strong young lady, and she is handling it well overall, but I know she is hurting.  I have promised her there will be other special events for her to celebrate, but I completely understand how she is feeling right now.  She mentioned how she didn't get to say good bye to her teachers, and I assured her we would communicate in some manner.  I keep telling her we are all grateful to be safe and healthy, and it's true.  It could be so much worse.

There are so many other emotions that go into all of this.  That's another post for another day.

Another week at home

We are at the weekend...although I pretty much get to sleep in every day!  The governor said this week that things might get to start opening back up on May 1, but I know it will probably be things like hair salons, or retail stores that can safely social distance.  Honestly, I am a little afraid because I'm not sure it is safe yet, not do I think the states can test or have the protection for health care.  I suppose it will be nice to have options, although I'm not sure how much I will take advantage.  We will just see what happens.

I am amazed at how wonderfully the kids are getting along.  They have always truly been each other's best friends, and this has brought harmony to their relationship again.  I think they both also realize these days won't last forever, and this time together is a gift.  They want to share so many things together.

We've continued family dinners and wii bowling and board games and card games, and family walks.  Some days have been tough.  There is no way graduation as it was supposed to be can happen on May 21, but there has been no official decision.  I try not to let myself think about the things we are losing, because ultimately, we are losing very little compared to so many.

You mean Saturday, Saturday, Saturday, Saturday, and Saturday?

Andrew and I are attempting to meal plan over the weekend for the following week.  We want to make sure that we are using perishable food so that nothing is wasted, and we also want to make sure that we can get everything we need for the week with only one grocery trip.  This past weekend, Andrew and I were having some trouble agreeing on things, and after we had the first two days decided, I mentioned we "only" had Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday to go.  Catherine looked at us and said, "You mean Saturday, Saturday, Saturday, Saturday, and Saturday?"  Andrew and I looked at each other and we both agreed she isn't wrong.  That is pretty much what it feels like around here.  Many days, it truly doesn't matter what day of the week it is.  On weekdays I set an alarm and get the kids up at 9, so everyone is pretty much sleeping in no matter what.  Catherine has to work on some days, and Andrew and I have actually had some video meetings this week, but generally speaking, each days just runs into the next.  There have been several days this week where we just weren't sure what day it was.  I've heard some people have even said it's like the movie Groundhog Day, where every day is exactly the same.  Some days it does feel like that!

A month into all of this

A month ago today was the first day of all of the coronavirus quarantine thing.  Although a month ago, we really didn't know what we know now.  Andrew went to work, and we actually got together with some friends (although I will point out there were only seven of us).  We just didn't know the seriousness of all of it or what we really needed to be doing.  I think we all thought by the end of April, at the latest, life would be back to normal.

Then of course, the restaurants and bars were closed...and that was just the beginning.  We really understand now the seriousness of everything, and that contact with other humans at this point is borderline dangerous.  We understand that staying home is the best thing to do.

We are beginning to understand that anything resembling a true normal may not happen again until July...and maybe not even then.  It's a little hard to swallow as it is only the middle of April, but we will do what we need to do.  I am hoping though, that we will feel it is safe to visit my grandmother and my in-laws long before that.

I honestly have to say I have enjoyed these days with my family.  I have enjoyed sleeping in and I have enjoyed our family dinners together.  We get to do that every day.  I have enjoyed our board games and card games.  I have enjoyed watching movies and family walks.  I am grateful that although my income is gone, Andrew is still getting paid so we will be fine.  I have hope that this only brings our family closer together!

Easter 2020

The four of us spent a lovely Easter together today, although it was certainly very different from any other Easter we've ever had.  The first thing is that it was really hard to not be able to be with EITHER side of the family.  Easter has pretty much always been an either/or holiday.  It's not really one that we can do with both sides of the family together.  It was tough not being with anyone, but I never forget to be grateful that we do have the kids with us.

We all really slept in, and that was really nice.  The kids then made a cake for our dessert, before Andrew got started on fixing dinner.  The kids also helped get the potatoes ready.  Once everything was prepped and ready to go, our family "did church".  Our Pastor sends out the readings and hymns for us to use as we wish, and then he video records a message/sermon for us to watch.  While we very much look forward to being able to worship in church with other members again soon (we hope!), we also appreciate the fact that with only the four of us sitting there, it really forces the kids to be involved.  We sat down and had a very nice dinner, and then we chatted with Andrew's parents while we ate dessert.  Oh goodness, we really miss them, but are so grateful for technology that helps to make them feel a little closer.

Although the weather is really wet today, spring is happening, and I'm grateful for Easter!

Another week of quarantine

I didn't write this week, because there really hasn't been anything to write about.  One day has literally blended into another.  In fact, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday could not have been less distinctive.  Yesterday, today, and tomorrow Catherine is working so that helps us better keep track of the days.  We also did a video chat with some friends last evening.  Overall, we are generally hanging in there.  Because of meetings and video conferences, things are beginning to have a little more of a schedule.

We did venture to see my mom today.  She was having trouble with her cell phone, and that is not something she is going to be able to handle on her own.  I took Thomas along because let's be honest, his tech knowledge far surpasses mine!  We were able to help with a few things at my grandmother's house while we were there.  I was also able to bring home the one thing I truly wanted from her house.  It was a Christmas decoration I had given her five years ago.  It was a table top decoration that listed all of the names of the great-grandkids.  One has been born since then, but otherwise it was complete.  I will enjoy having that at the holidays.  Mom also sent home some pictures of my family that we had given to G.G.  She even sent home my own high school senior picture!  It is kind of fun to have those things.  Mom's rules are that if something was given to G.G. as a gift, the giver has first dibs.  I'm not sure there would be much there from me beyond the pictures.  I don't plan to ask for much else.  To be honest, my memories, and the pictures I've taken over the years mean more to me than most other things!

Happy Good Friday!

A weekend that was full of love

Our friends had asked us this weekend if we could do a video chat with them last night.  I wasn't sure about this...it just didn't feel natural, and I am not very good at technology.  You know what though, we had a blast!  We were even able to include our friends in Missouri, with whom we don't chat on a regular basis.  Three hours later, we finally all said good night to each other.

Yesterday, a cousin had also sent our a note that he wanted to get everyone together.  We got to spend two hours tonight visiting with family in Kentucky, Massachusetts, Virginia, and North Carolina, as well as other Ohioans.  So much laughter was shared again this evening.  It made my heart so full.

Andrew and I also made a "hello" video to high school students today.  A teacher had sent out an email that she wanted to put this together to send out to our students, and Andrew wanted me included.  I suspect seeing the final project will make me cry, because I am missing the students so much.

I know that we have been doing this for three weeks, and we have AT LEAST four weeks to go...and realistically it could be another six to eight weeks.  But for this weekend, it was so nice to feel connected to others!

Old is new again

With so much extra time on our hands, our family has been making an effort each evening to do something that requires the kids to put down their phones and do something with family.  We've played board games, card games, and wii games, we've taken walks, and we've watched movies and TV.  The watching TV games are not my favorite nights, because I don't necessarily enjoy us sitting around and staring at a screen, but sometimes laughter is much needed, and it is always good for the soul.

While movies are great, sometimes I'm not interested in a commitment of a couple of hours, and that is when TV shows are the best choice.  We've gone through all of the series our family loves, so sometimes we watch a disc again just to avoid the commercials on TV (they are all being shown in syndication right now).  However, a couple of years ago, during a White Elephant Christmas exchange Andrew received the first season of "Greatest American Hero".  Last week when we were having pizza for dinner, I mentioned it might be a good time to check it out.  I watched it as a child, but I was young and don't really remember specifics.  We've put it in, and we've so enjoyed watching an episode on a couple of evenings!  The technology, of course, is not awesome, but that just adds to it!  These episodes are nearly 40 years old, but they are bringing entertainment to us even now!

A walk on campus

Today is an absolutely gorgeous day.  We ate a fairly early dinner, so after dinner Andrew wanted to take our sweet pup on a walk.  I don't usually love to join him, but it is such a gorgeous evening.  We decided to head to campus.  Honestly, I haven't walked around campus just to walk around, in many years.  I had been on the other (north end) but not the part where I spent most of my time, and I had never walked around campus with my kids.  I showed them the dorms in which I lived, and in two of the three buildings I could even pick out the exact window.  It was a fun way to spend a little time.  I suspect with campus being so incredibly empty, we'll have some time to do it again sometime!

I may or may not have shed some tears during the Garth and Tricia live special

My favorite performer of all time is Garth Books.  I love everything Garth.  When I left for college in 1992, I pretty much listened to Garth all the time.  Only Garth, all the time.  My dad shared my love for Garth.  I have the videos of his concerts.  I just love Garth.

Tonight, Garth did a live concert with Tricia Yearwood on CBS.  I was looking forward to it all day.  All four of us sat down in front of the TV and watched it together.  I'll be honest, I shed a few tears during the hour-long special.  For one thing, it simply reminded me of a simpler time.  It reminded me of my dad, and it just really got to me.

Today, the Ohio health director admitted we shouldn't get too excited about summer plans.  Ohio is making plans to delay fall sports.  This means, that the state isn't sure we will have a semblance of normal even by August.  This was really tough for me.  I have a senior daughter, and I'm just not sure what is happening with things.  I can't imagine not getting to spend time with my mom, my grandma, or my in-laws for months and months.  And of course, friends.  This was tough news to absorb.

Garth sang songs that are so heart-felt.  It all just got to me.  I am so grateful for being with my family, and I know we will get through this.  Today was just a tough day, and I'm so thankful for TV special to make it a little better!