Monday emotions

When Catherine got her new job last week and was scheduled to work tomorrow morning, it suddenly became obvious that she needed to go back to school today instead of later in the week.  Ultimately, I guess I'm glad it was more of a "rip off the bandaid" rather than being sad about it coming up all week.  She will be back for dinner Wednesday to celebrate our first day of school.  We sure did loving having her around.  My heart hurt when I saw her location on my app.  I know it's a good thing and time moves on, but oh goodness, I love having my girl around.  I have some guilt that we didn't do lots of fun things this summer and I can't help but feel it is my fault because I was working.  She would often be off to work as I was coming home, so we didn't get to do lots of family activities that I would normally enjoy each summer.

My youngest starts his senior year in less than 36 hours.  I can't even begin to fathom how this happened so fast.  I'm so proud of the young man he is becoming.  I'm just not ready to be finished with parenting kids 24/7, yet here we are.  A classmate of mine just became a grandmother.  It's so hard for me to believe that is the phase of life we are entering.

We also made a decision about my grandmother's car.  We had been planning to buy it from her, but my sister and I hadn't made any final arrangements yet.  My aunt's car died, and I felt it was the right thing to offer it to her.  We still had the old car that Thomas was driving, but Thomas was so disappointed when I told him.  I hate disappointing my kids, but I did feel it was the right thing.  We all have so many things that tie us to my grandmother, and we don't need the car.

Today was also the day that I attended my final Open House as a parent.  As I drove into the high school parking lot, I began to cry.  I'm grateful for my job, but my heart is still at that school.  I miss subbing and being with all of the kids.  The hard part to accept is that I could be doing office work and applied for jobs at the school, but it just didn't work out that way.  I know I'm so blessed to have what I have, but I also know it's okay to be sad at the same time.

So many emotions on this Monday in the middle of August.  So much going on this week as well...going to need to unwind this weekend!