Grateful for today

I am so grateful for this day.  Don't get me wrong, I am always grateful for each day, but sometimes I forget to be truly grateful.  After this past week, I am especially grateful for today.

The kids and I were on the road home yesterday by 6AM.  Ugh!  With it being Thomas's senior year, I had promised him that I would get him home if he wanted to attend his band competition yesterday.  He had to leave for the high school by Noon, and I didn't want to cut it closer than necessary.  Andrew got home about 6PM last night.  His mother send tons of food, so we ate some of the pasta that was sent.  Tonight's dinner is chili, also complements of his mother.

Today is bright and sunny, which is much appreciated.  It's cool though, and in fact there are no high's in the forecast higher than the 50's.  Our woods are still very green, but the town is gorgeous.  Since it is Halloween, I bought some candy apples for our dessert this evening.

It was a tough, tough week, but I am so incredibly grateful our family has today before things get too crazy again!

I will always remember this birthday

This has definitely been a birthday that is not all about me, and I'm completely okay with that.  The kids and I arrived at Andrew's parents last night, and we've been as helpful as we can be today.  I'm not going to complain about having us all together.  I had wanted to go out to dinner, but my mother-in-law didn't, and honestly, there is a ridiculous amount of food here, so we just ate at home.  I asked for ice cream, and I enjoyed the meal.

Additionally, my grandmother was taken to the hospital overnight.  I'm still not entirely certain what has happened, but although they are keeping her tonight for observation, they expect she will be sent home tomorrow.

It feels strange to say that I'm 48 now.  It doesn't feel that anything has changed, but this is definitely a birthday I won't forget!

Too much sadness

My heart is beyond broken.  I learned this morning that a schoolmate who had been fighting cancer was called home to Heaven last night.  I knew she'd had a rough summer, but I didn't realize the end was in sight.  Her husband said she fought to the end, and I have no doubt.  Lynda was my sister's age, and her sister and I were in classes together all through school.  We had lots of playdates with the four of us!  Lynda and I worked together at summer camps a few years, and she was truly the nicest, most genuinely kind person I've ever met.  She ALWAYS had a smile on her face, and she was grateful for every moment.  Her three children range in age from 16-11, and this just doesn't seem fair.  It doesn't seem fair at all.  When I called this morning to tell my mom, she began to weep.  This is just a day of sadness.

Random Tuesday thoughts

It's been a long week, and an even longer 14 hours.  My original plan was for us to attend school today, but that is only happening for Catherine.  Thomas didn't get home until almost 9:00 last night, so his grieving didn't begin until then.  He was distraught, and I wasn't going to let him be alone.  That meant a late night for us. Since I have to drive today, being exhausted didn't seem a good idea, so we are both home.  I regret that Thomas will miss four days of school, but I don't regret my decision. 

Last evening Andrew and I were on the phone (before the passing) and he was out walking with the dog.  He mentioned during the conversation that he saw a shooting star.  I remembered thinking, "this is it."  Sure enough, when he got back to his parents' house, his dad had passed.

Today is an absolutely beautiful day.  If we had needed to travel yesterday, it was raining (heavily at times) and just absolutely yucky.  I'm grateful we get to travel today instead of yesterday.  Not only is the weather better, but we should be able to see gorgeous scenery as leaves should be changing.  Strangely enough, it is still VERY green outside my window, but that should be changing this week.

I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to hugging my husband and having our family together this evening.  It's been a really tough week of separation and waiting and emotions.  I'm grateful there is no more suffering, and I'm grateful for family.

RIP Tom

My father-in-law passed away this evening.  I'm so grateful that Andrew was there with his parents, but it is awful not being with him.  I completely underestimated Thomas's emotional reaction.  He is devastated.  I am so grateful that my father-in-law is not longer suffering.  I'm looking forward to hugging my husband tomorrow.

Still waiting

I talked to Andrew about 45 minutes ago.  His dad is still holding on, and still seems to be fighting.  As Catherine said, the marine in him doesn't quit.  If he were simply fighting an infection or something from which he could recover, we would be thrilled.  Unfortunately, in this case it is just prolonging the inevitable, and it's really hard on everyone.  If it weren't for the kids, I would have headed over to spend the weekend, but we don't want them to have to miss more school than necessary.   I also don't receive any paid time off, so it's not helpful for me to miss a bunch of work either.  Andrew is very worried that his dad is suffering.  Praying for peace and comfort for our family.

Final Friday night marching

Tonight was the very last evening I'll have a kiddo perform during the halftime of the high school football game.  My goodness.  It's so, so hard to believe.  It's hard that Andrew can't be here, but I wasn't going to miss my kiddo in his last Friday night performance.

I won't miss marching band and my responsibilities, but I will miss how much my kiddos have enjoyed band.  It's been a great experience and I'm grateful. 

I was very emotional as I drove up to the game.  It sounds as though Andrew's dad is down to hours.  That is hard, and it's hard that we can't all be together.  It's also hard that Andrew can't be here for the end of the season.

Looking forward to sleeping well tonight!

It's been a long week, but it's not over yet

This has been a long, and very draining week.  Andrew's dad is still with us.  He's actually been fairly cognizant and responsive.  While we are grateful in many regards, no one is interested in this being prolonged.

Additionally, my mother called this evening to let me know the husband of one of her friends passed was found unresponsive and passed away this morning.  A co-worker at the church lost her dog today, and as it was a beagle it broke my heart (I am missing our sweet girl who is with Andrew right now).  This same co-worker had a daughter who was in a terrible car accident this week and was seriously injured.  We also know that Thomas is struggling with emotions of everything.  My heart hurts about all of this, and to be honest, the worst is yet to come.  I continue to pray for a peaceful passing for Andrew's father, and I hope I can be with Andrew soon.  I hate not being with him, but we need to minimize the amount of time the kids miss school.   This has been a really tough week.

An unexpected trip

Yesterday morning I received a call from Andrew.  Overnight Sunday, Andrew's dad took a significant turn.  The hospice nurse yesterday was concerned that it was the end, and recommended that Andrew not leave.  I worked 1/2 day, and then I headed over.  We couldn't have Thomas missing an unlimited amount of school.  Our sweet pup and I loaded up the car and arrived around 8:00.  Andrew's dad was asleep the entire evening, although I did get to see him open his eyes this morning.  It was heart wrenching to watch Thomas say goodbye this morning.  I was grateful to hear that Andrew FaceTimed with Catherine so that she could also say good bye.

Thomas and I were on the road home by 9:00 this morning.  Thomas had a doctor appointment scheduled this afternoon.  That ended up being what pushed my emotions over the edge...we forgot to take the necessary forms with us!  This is a new doctor, and I'm sure they wondered about the crazy woman standing there in tears over forms!  In addition to being emotionally drained, I hadn't slept well Sunday night while Andrew and Thomas were at the game, so I was just exhausted.

I'm grateful that we didn't have to worry about Andrew getting there and trying to see his dad.  I'm grateful we had the opportunity to say goodbye, and I'm grateful for all of the memories.  The hospice nurse confirmed this morning that it could be today, it could be next week.   I'm sending prayers it will be peaceful, and that it is sooner rather than later.  I know how hard it is on Andrew and his mom to see his dad suffer.  I'm also hoping everyone can get a good night sleep tonight!

This isn't the weekend I wanted

 The weekend is drawing to an end.  To be honest, I really don't mind.  This is the not the weekend that I would have chosen, but it is the weekend that needed to happen.  Andrew and Thomas don't have school tomorrow, so they are at Andrew's parents...and actually right now, they are at the football game.  I don't mind.  It's just that the timing is really tough.  Normally, I enjoy an expanse of time completely to myself.  However, it was just six weeks ago that Andrew and the kids were there for the weekend.  Also, a week ago this past Friday my school was closed so I had that entire day to myself.

And honestly, this past week I didn't get to see my family much, especially Andrew.  Monday I went straight from school to church, and it was nearly 7:30 before I got home.  Thomas was still at band practice for another hour.  Tuesday Thomas worked, but Andrew and I did get to spend the evening together with our friends at their daughter's volleyball game.  Wednesday Andrew played frisbee golf after school and I had a band meeting.  Thursday was the worst.  Andrew had to work an athletic event and didn't get home until nearly 11.  Friday was a home football game.  Thomas went out with friends after, so he was home at 11:30, and Andrew helped to get ready for the league cross country meet so it was 10:30 before he was home.  Yesterday Andrew was out the door by 7:30 to work the meet.  Thomas had to be at school mid-afternoon for a band competition, then Andrew left late afternoon to go as well.  They left directly from the competition to head east.  It's a good thing, I know this.  I love that they get to do this together, but I'm a little lonely and I miss them.  I've been able to be productive, but I would've preferred having the family around.

I've truly appreciated the cooler weather this weekend.  I love fall!

This has been a bit extreme

We had a ridiculously warm week here.  We were able to turn the a/c off overnight for a few days because the humidity had dropped.  By the end of the week though, the humidity had made things muggy again.  I know though, that overnight last night a cold front was coming through.  It sure did, and there were even some tornadoes in the region.  We got lucky though, the rain didn't really start until after the game, and by this morning, it was beyond gorgeous.  I ventured out to our high school to watch the league cross country meet, and it was actually very chilly.  When I got home, I thought I might even want to turn on the furnace.  That was NOT going to happen though.  It is bad enough to have the a/c and furnace on within the same week.  I sure as heck was not going to have it on within the same twenty-four hours!

I am loving the chill in the air and the arrival of the fall weather!  It's especially awesome on a weekend!

I hate everything about having the a/c on in October

 It is entirely too warm for any point of October, but especially as we enter the double digits tomorrow.  I should not have to have the a/c on at any point in October, let alone at this point.  And the worst part is, this isn't the worst!  It's going to be warmer tomorrow and again on Monday.  Granted, the humidity is not "August like" and it does cool down in the evenings, but ugh.  I want my cozy sweatshirts and changing leaves.  Next weekend will be in the 60's...finally!  

I remember many years ago when my husband and I were refusing to turn the heat on early in October because it was so chilly.  Definitely not the situation these days!

The best kind of Thursday

I don't have to work tomorrow!  There is no school at the private school where I work.  This break is coming at a good time.  There has been some drama and some stress, and I'm grateful for an opportunity to sleep in.  Andrew and Thomas not only have school, but they also have an away football game tomorrow evening.  My plan is to pick up the house this evening, and then spend tomorrow scrapbooking.  This is the best kind of Thursday!! 

My world

Tonight we met Catherine for dinner.  As we were leaving, I took a picture of Catherine and Thomas.  They are so grown up, and it made my heart hurt.  They are my world, and I just can't believe I don't get to spend every day with them under my roof.  I'm still soaking up the time with Thomas that I can, but I know that there is year is going to go very, very quickly.  I know that I should be grateful and not sad, but I fought some tears as we left her.

We had a surprise at dinner as well.  One of the waiters at the restaurant had graduated with Catherine, and Andrew had him class.  I also had a good relationship with him as he was an Ag kid.  His family moved away last year.  It was so cool to see him.   He came over later and told us if anyone asks, we are his aunt & uncle because he applied his family discount to our bill.  What a fabulous surprise!  It was truly just to be kind, because he wasn't our waiter so he got nothing out of it.

It's been a lovely evening.  I'm so grateful to share it with my little family.

Not loving the 80's

Sadly, this isn't about the decade...nope.  I was pretty much fine with the 80's, especially the music!  No, this is about the weather and the forecasted temps.  I am not okay with seeing highs in the 80's at this point in October.  I don't care that it is the low 80's!  I am ready for highs in the 60's!  There has been exactly ONE of those days this entire fall.  I want my sweatshirts and cozy flannel pajamas and a fire in the fireplace.  Where are my cooler temps??? 

The first weekend in October

Sunday evening has arrived, and the weekend is drawing to a close.  It was a very nice weekend...I don't think October can have bad weekends!  

Friday evening Andrew and I attempted to eat dinner at the state park lodge dining hall.  I'd been wanting to go ever since we'd had our ladies night away in July.  The lodge overlooks the lake and it's truly lovely walking.  Unfortunately, between it being Family weekend for the university and a festival that was being held at the state park, the restaurant couldn't accommodate us.  I asked Andrew to walk with me though so we could at least enjoy the view for a bit.  We ended up ordering Mexican take out and sharing a few episodes of a family favorite TV show.  Thomas was in the pep band for the the away football game, and I was grateful that Andrew waited up for him so I could get to bed early.  It had been a truly rough week at work.

Yesterday it was blissful to sleep in, although Andrew had to work an athletic event.  I spent the entire day picking up the house, and was counting down to the UC/Notre Dame football game.  That sure ended up not going the way I wanted it to!!!  I never like it when Notre Dame loses, but I especially detest losing to the Bearcats.  UGH!!!

The evening was definitely the highlight of the weekend.  Thomas attended a band competition, so it was just Andrew and me hosting my lifelong friend who currently lives in NYC.  Although we had done some virtual cocktails, it had been two years since we were able to visit with him in person.  We are so grateful for the few hours we were able to spend together.

This morning I was up and headed to my hometown to get my grandmother to a COVID test.  She is scheduled for surgery this week that should alleviate some hip pain.  I returned to town and went straight to church to work.  I made sure I was home in time to watch the Steelers matchup against the Packers...which also is not going the way I would want it to go.

Another busy week is coming up, but I have no school on Friday!  Nothing better than an extra long weekend in October!