It's all so different

Andrew and I have commented on how everything just feels so different.  It's so different when we get home each day and Abby isn't at our door to greet us with her loving squeals and wagging tail.  It's so different that on Tuesday we were able to run and grab some dinner after work without having to worry about getting home to let her out.  It's so different that there is no animal howling at us around 5:00 each day (and again at 8 for a snack) because it's dinner time.  Even without Abby, Lincoln was the one that started howling first, but he's gone too.  It just really sucks.  I was looking at a picture of her today, and the tears began to flow.  I didn't mean for them too, but she just didn't feel old, and seven years wasn't enough with her.  I really thought she was the beagle who was going to live longer than the average of 12-15 years, and I certainly never thought she'd be gone at 12.

Outside seems different.  It's been entirely too warm this October.  There is a chance that it will be in the 70's during Trick-or-Treating on Thursday.  That's crazy.  The leaves are finally starting to really turn color, but it's just less than it has been in years past.

The holidays are going to feel so different this year as well.  Thomas doesn't live here, so he won't be waking up in our house on Christmas morning.  I haven't completely wrapped my head around that yet.  Because of the way things fall this year, we decided to do our Thanksgiving meal on the Sunday before.  I'm actually kind of excited about this.  It was really important to me that we decorate the tree together, but I refuse to serve a Thanksgiving meal with a tree up.  This will allow us to decorate the tree Wednesday evening and we can watch our Friends episodes as well.  These things are going to be different, but we can go with them.

Christmas shopping is going to feel different this year as well.  Some friends have decided we are going to stop exchanging gifts, and the kids truly need mostly just money.  There will be a few cute and traditional gifts here and there, but no one really wants "things" just for the sake of having a gift.  I bought my mom tickets to a performance she wanted, and that took care of that.

I don't love change, and it feels like there is so much that is different. I know it isn't all bad, but right now it sure doesn't necessarily feel good either.  Even