This last day of January sure held a lot of emotion

Today is the last day of January, and it always the day we celebrate becoming a family.  I will forever be grateful to have been a mother to my three kiddos.  For the first time, I'm not sure we will actually have an opportunity to celebrate it as a family, but that is probably okay.  My kids are adults, and looking to the future and starting their own families.  I miss having little ones, but I'm so grateful for the adults they are becoming.

I also learned this morning that a school mate had passed away after taking his own life.  Ryan and I met in second grade, and we were Mutt and Jeff according to many.  I'm just under 5', and he is over 6'.  We could fight like cats and dogs, but we were friends.  I hadn't seen him in over 20 years, but saw him again last February when we attended the funeral for another classmate.  His daughter went to college here in town, and I kept meaning to reach out to his parents (who I've seen many times over the years, sadly, mostly at the funeral home) to get his number so we could visit sometime when his family was in town.  I never did though, and now I can't.  I'm angry at him for taking this route, and I'm angry at myself that I didn't make more of an effort.  And I'm so heartbroken for the family and loved ones he left behind.

I'm very grateful today is Friday.  Sleep isn't coming easily tonight, and I'm glad I can sleep in tomorrow.