Boys of Fall

Kenny Chesney's song "Boys of Fall" is one of my all-time favorite songs.  This time of year I could literally listen to it over and over again.  It is a song that literally makes me feel fall.  And of course, we all know that I love football!  Last Thursday was awesome because of the kick off of the college season, and tonight is the NFL kick off!  I already know how I am going to spend this Saturday.  Thomas and Andrew will be camping, and after I spend several hours watching Robert & Catherine run at their cross country meet, I will spend the rest of day enjoying football.  It is that simple.

And yet, I remember three years ago when Robert was actually playing the sport.  I really didn't like watching his games, and there were times when I literally dreaded the hours I was going to be sitting at his game.  For years I have beat myself up that I am a horrible mother...but now I think I've gained some insight into it.  Robert and football were not a match made in Heaven...not even close.  Not only was he not very good (that is reality) he didn't like it.  In fact there was really nothing about the sport that he enjoyed it all, but he knew that he had made a commitment, and in our family we honor our commitments. 

It doesn't help that many of the young men with whom he played (not all, not even most, but still way too many) were the boys who were making life miserable for Robert (and others).  It's hard to get excited about a young man who is streaking down the sideline to score a touchdown when I know how he is treating other people.

And more than anything, I'm not going to beat myself up about this.  I loved, absolutely LOVED watching Robert run track last spring.  In fact, I went to every meet while Andrew volunteered to stay home with the younger ones since he didn't particularly enjoy it.  I appreciate allowing myself to let go of some of the "mom guilt"!